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I need to leave, but I'm scared.

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 February 2008) 2 Answers - (Newest, 10 February 2008)
A female age 30-35, *airhalflin writes:

I have a bf that I've been with 7 months...

Egh things aren't that greta I can say. He just doesn't care...he ditches me for being lazy...

Its been like that for a long time...in the begining I could've left him for 3 other guys but I stuck with him...I don't know why.

and and I know for a fact that I can never love him...ever. I know this in my heart. I don't see the relationship going anywhere...

There's this other guy that I've grown to love.

I've never told him nothing...

He says he loves me.

I believe him.

He's sad because I have a bf so he tries to keep things safe.

He respects me and and is patiently waiting for me.

I need to leave my bf now.

I'm just so scared.

Egh

What to do?

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A female reader, fairhalflin  +, writes (10 February 2008):

fairhalflin is verified as being by the original poster of the question

fairhalflin agony auntI finally told him.

I told him as gentle as I could and he seemed to understand.

He told me that he wishes me the best and that I could call him whenever I wanted.

Then towards the end he just started trying to make me feel bad.

But I understand.

I guess its not the end of the world

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2008):

You obviously feel the need to end it with your boyfriend. And sooner seems to be better than later, so tell him you need to talk. Ask him to come round tonight or something, and tell him exactly what you've told us. You could say something along the lines of, ''Look, I do like you, I do, but I just feel we'd be better off apart at the moment. Things aren't really seeming to go anywhere, and it's time for us to move on. I need some space.''

This way, it's gentle, but firm. Keep eye contact, and let him know you're serious. No matter what he says to try and persuade you back to him (which he will probably do) or even if he cries, you have to keep strong. I've experienced giving in to finishing a guy because of him begging, and it doesn't make the relationship any stronger at all. You really do need to be firm.

Once you have things sorted with your current boyfriend, then you might be able to think about this other guy. He sounds dead nice. Take it slow with him, and don't jump in straight away after your ex, or rub it in his face. Just try and be careful about the choices you make.

Hope everything goes ok :]

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