A
female
age
41-50,
*ellflower
writes:HelloI must be some kind of a controlfreak, and I'm about to lose my boyfriend, whom I have been with for nine years now. I'll lose everything if I lose him, the house, the pets, everything I ever build with him.(I've been in this situation before, but this time it's so real and intense, I'm hanging in a thread)I think I need to give him some space, but how?What should I do? Any advises? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, bellflower +, writes (19 May 2012):
bellflower is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have done too many things to upset him...where do I start...
Sometimes I keep asking him about other women, it drives him crazy, and I like to stop doing that. I trust him, but I keep asking and presuming things
Then I knew his passwords to some sites (and he knew mine) even though he didn't want me to knew them. (now I don't know any passwords).
I'm so afraid to lose him, that I do exactly the opposite of what I suppose to and always try to control him! And therefore losing him.
I really would like to be a better person, I love him, he's the love of my life. But how, how do I show I don't mean to be controlling anymore, I want to change.
I want this to work 3
A
female
reader, Starlights  +, writes (19 May 2012):
 What is it you have done to upset him?
Because;depending on the nature of this problem the advice can be varied.
Whatever it is you can apologise and respect his space by not being in his face so much so he can think it all over.
Be prepared and have something in the pipeline in case you do lose everything.
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