A
male
age
41-50,
*ilopinoPhenom
writes:so my girlfriend and i are planning to have sex christmas time. i'm worried about it though cuz lately i havent been getting my usualy 5 and a half erections that are strong, i keep getting like just 5 semi hard. she gets me semi hard by dry humping me while straddling and we have intense makeout from there. what else can she do to get me harder and keep me harder? we were planning to have sex in the dark in my room under the blankets is that good? will that help too cuz no distractions? please tips and everything so i can get my erections ready. foods and exercises i should eat or do before dec 18. i really want good answers plz and is getting a handjob semi hard good? she gets me semi hard and wants to give me a handjob but i never let her cuz its just semi hard, will i get harder if she starts feeling my penis semi hard and does a handjob anyways?
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christmas, dry sex, erection, hand-job, my penis Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (7 December 2009):
 I suggest you eat lots and lots of waffles before Dec 18, preferably blueberry.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (7 December 2009):
 You are waaaayyyyy too focused on your performance, and not enough on the expectation of a mutually pleasurable experience. You are not on a stage, you are not being graded by your erection firmness.
Here's something most men have trouble believing, but try: we don't judge you if you are not rock hard the entire lovemaking session. We are realists, and know that that is physically impossible to achieve unless you've got some drug on board. It's normal for some flaccidity to occur DURING the session, you get distracted because you're focusing on her, or the phone rings, or she squeezes you too hard somewhere.
So lighten up! And another dirty secret. For women, the erection is only a small part of what we love about being with the man--the rest of the experience is important: being close, feeling sexy and desired and loved, finding out that he wants to pleasure the woman.
It sounds like you've been watching porno and taking lessons from it. No no no no. Porn is NOT a teaching tool, it is NOT the way to learn how to please a woman, it's designed to get men off, it's a male fantasy. If you want to learn what women want, buy some of those racy romance novels (the ones with some sex scenes in them) and those will give you an idea of what women fantasize about. (I have to be honest, I haven't read one for years, so I could be wrong about this.)
Here's some reading for you, and finally, STOP STRESSING about this.
http://www.malehealth.co.uk/userpage1.cfm?item_id=153#moresexy
http://men.webmd.com/guide/sex-fact-fiction
http://men.webmd.com/features/life-cycle-of-a-penis
http://men.webmd.com/features/6-sex-mistakes-men-make
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2009): Dude,
This question (three variations of it) has been posted thrice by you and answered by kind souls already.
The question is not really clear - what is 5 half? And if you keep obsessing about Dec18, you are going to ruin it for yourself.
Why not speak to your girlfriend and go along with what you both like? If she does something you like encourage her, if it is not working, change it. And get her to do what you do to make yourself hard.
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/help-with-my-erections.html
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-need-help-with-harder-erections-with-girlfriend.html
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