A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I am 15 and so is my friend who I am trying to support at the moment. I was just wondering if I could have some ideas on a way I can support my friend. She is having a tough time at the moment with exams, home life and at school. She has been self harming which I have not been aware until about 2 or 3 weeks ago. I told her I can't help her much because I am only a student and I dont know what is best for her but I will be there for her if she needs someone to talk to. I did convince her to talk to a teacher but she feels that it has made everything worse. She self harms more and I'm worried she might get infected or something. I also at one lunch time noticed a letter in my pocket and it turned out to be suicide note. I panicked and didn't no what to do for the best. I talked to her about it and she seemed to feel a bit better. She hasn't got a problem with opening up to me about how she is feeling but she won't talk t anyone else. My friends are beggining to get annoyed with me because I havent been with them at breaks or lunches and I'm trying to support the person aswell as help other people becuase I already have a very busy scedule. She has got some professional help but I'm still really worried becuase I thought she was o.k. when I rang her to check she was O.K. after going to counciling. The next day I didn't see her at school and I had an exam so I left my phone at home, but when I got home I had 4 missed calls and 2 texts. One said sorry for everything and the other was I'm in hospital but don't worry about me. She rang me later and told me she overdosed and now I just don't know what to do. I thought if I got her tell a teacher everything would get better but she is really angry because her mum knows. What would you suggest I do to support her? Like I said before I have a really busy schedule, I'm late at school until 5:30 everyday and I normally don't have breaks and lunches becuase I am busy and when I get home I have alot of courcework and homework that I need to complete as well as studying an extra GCSE. I try to support her when ever I can but I can't be there for her 24/7. Any ideas would be appreciated and thank you for reading this extrememly long question. x
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female
reader, vamp-gal +, writes (24 October 2009):
 Aww, that's great!!
Congratulations on getting A grades in your exams and that's really great news about your friend too =) xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi
I know this has been a while but I would like to say a very big thank you to your advise. I eneded up getting A grades in my exams and my friend is now feeling much better and has now stabalised :D
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your answers. It really is helpful to have reassurance. I iwll keep posted on how things go and I have rated your answers, they were fantastic so thank you.
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A
female
reader, vamp-gal +, writes (22 November 2008):
Hey,
Wow, this is hard, you really are so busy, but also want to support your friend.
Maybe, you could set out a schedual or something and spend time with this friend about 1 or 2 hours every day, or every other day, which ever suits you best.
Your friend seems to be going through a stage where she feels the world is out to get her, you have to help her realize that it's not and there are people out there who care about her, and want her to go back to her old self.
You keep doing what you're doing and be there for her, just them little things can make a lot of difference.
Also make sure you're not overloading/overworking yourself, carry on studying for your exams, but don't go overboard, it won't help and you'll feel exhausted.
I'm sorry if this hasn't helped much, but I hope in any way at all it has been able to help.
Your friend probably doesn't want to harm herself, but feels it's the only way she can deal with the other things that are causing pain in her life, without getting anybody else involved.
Hope this helps.
Good luck with everything!
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A
female
reader, Asked Angel +, writes (22 November 2008):
 Hun, you have done the right thing by trying to get your friend outside help. YOU CANNOT deal with this all by yourself and your friend should not be expecting you too. Unfortuntley no body can help anyone unless they help themselves. I'm glad your friends mum now know's, maybe she can try to help.
Sweetie you cannot take this all on your shoulders it's not fair. I'm not saying don't be there for your friend but you can't be her everything, her whole world and her only support. That is not fair on either of you.
Good Luck :)
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