A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So me and my boyfriend are a little bit new to making out (we're both each other's firsts). We've tried kissing before but I found it a bit awkward ... I understand that when you're french kissing your tongues are supposed to interact, but what do your lips do while that happens? Do I just open my mouth really wide while we're french kissing? And how long are we supposed to do that anyway?And any tips for neck kisses? We're both 18 and have been dating for 3 months.
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (23 August 2013):
 Look, you just need to try different things and see what works. People kiss differently, everyone has a different style and thing they like. There's no "how long" when it comes to kissing. Some people kiss for hours. Others prefer a peck that lasts half a second. It's all up to the two of you to figure out what YOU want.
What I do when I first kiss someone new (and this goes for everyone new, no matter if they've ever kissed before or not) is to test the waters. First pecks, lips pressed up against lips. Then separate lips a bit, no tongue. Just try different styles of opening your mouth slightly and kiss that way, without tongue. Then as you get more comfortable with that the tongue comes naturally.
Listen to your partner, pay attention to what they do:
Pull away from you = End the kiss.
Press their lips harder against yours = They want more.
Open their lips = You open yours.
Flick your lips with their tongue = They want contact, go out to greet them with your tongue or close your lips to signal that you don't want tongue.
Never push your tongue into the other persons mouth unless that's what you both want. Tongue kisses are best when you both just greet the others tongue and then mimic each others moves. If they pull back the tongue do NOT go chasing it. Pull yours back too. If they roll their tongue around, and you like it, you can roll yours back. If you don't like it pull your tongue back and close your mouth. If it's REALLY bad, then end the kiss, look the person in the eyes, and tell them straight out you didn't like it. They next time they try something else.
But what you need to do is just mimic each other, and it'll be easy. That way you teach each other what you like and how you want to kiss. Sometimes one will reach out the tongue for a tongue kiss right when the other close their mouth, and thus end up sucking the tongue by accident. It happens! Just laugh! Kissing is fun, so don't take it seriously.
You can flick your tongue, roll it around, gently meet the others, press it up against each other, do whatever you want. Just do not push your tongue down their throat and do not pick their teeth either... Your tongue doesn't need to be in the other persons mouth... the tongues should meet in the middle.
Test it out, people like different things. Maybe you even like the "deep" down each others throats kisses... Who knows. You will develop your unique style.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2013): First off, it'll all start becoming more natural to you eventually. Until that time comes though here are some pointers. Firstly, before you French kiss, just start off by doing doing normal soft kissing, then when it feels right just gently probe your tongue in. You could start just by licking his lips then pushing it in his mouth a bit. It's best to keep your own lips not moving that much. Don't open your mouth too wide. No one wants to be swallowed whole or come away with a wet ring around their mouth! That's about all I can say really..
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A
female
reader, mysterygirlblue +, writes (23 August 2013):
just do what feels right kissing is not scientific
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