A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I'm a 42-year old divorcee. I had a crush on my boss who is 15 years younger. But the biggest problem is, he's married. I think he's also interested in me cos' had been getting many hints from him! I know it's wrong, so I tried to "disagree" with him as often as possible in our daily conversation, thinking it'll make me dislike him. It didn't work. On the contuary, I'm beginning to fall in love with him more. He's alsays so caring and understanding, thus making it very difficult for me.Telling me to get him out of my mind is not going to work. Please give me some concrete and practical advice. Thanks.
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crush, crush on my boss, divorce, my boss Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Libra1963 +, writes (20 March 2011):
It is so easy to form relationships with people with work with so closely. See him as a friend. You can love your friends. Dont me the older pathetic women who allows herself to be used and then asked to leave the organisation due to the disrepute you have brought on yourself and the company. Normally it is the woman who leaves, not the man.
Get over it. Enjoy his attention but focus on someone else who is available.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (17 March 2011):
Well, I'll give you some practical advice. Put yourself in his wife's shoes. How would you feel if the love of your life betrayed and cheated on you? Now put yourself back in your own shoes. How would you feel knowing that your relationship with him cost the devastation of his wife and innocent children?
If he is showing interest in cheating on his wife, he's neither caring nor understanding, or he'd be faithful to his wife. Would you want to date a guy who could cheat on the woman he professes love to without remorse? Because if he can do it for you, he can do it to you as soon as he tires of you.
Never ever confuse love for pursuit. He'll say nice things, caring, affection, but there's an end game. Once he has you, he'll get distant, nervous, have no intention of leaving his wife, etc.
Keep him in your mind, but look at him for who he really is. And keep his wife in your mind as well. If he ever says an unkind word about her, his words are worthless. He must diminish her in your and his own eyes in order to justify and convince you to sleep with him.
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