A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'v been cheated on twice. I have only been in two relationships, no casual sex no friends with beneficts never ever. I always thought those were mistakes that must be avoided. I am having such a big problem getting over those bad experiences. i waited 5 years after the first bad experience to try again and after that i waited 5 years more after the second bad experience. only two relationships in ten years. i want to try again but please don't focuss too much in the amount of time i waited. it doesnt matter as i think sex is something i want to do with people i love so i don't want to go around just getting a list of lovers that look like a resume. i need help to restore my faith in mankind.... thank you Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (2 September 2010):
 I hope this story helps.
My sister was living in Australia and met a man who she fell in love with. He treated her like she was a convienence store. When it suited him he called her and was nice to her then when he wasn't in the mood he basically told her to buzz off and leave him alone. She put up with this for a couple of years and then decided to move back to New Zealand. About 9 months after she got back she met another man who seemed perfect. very good looking, suscessful and kind. 6 months into the relationship as they got over that inital lust part he started to spend more time with his friends and she was expected to fit in when it suited him. Then he cheated on her with his children's nanny so she ended it. She spent 3 years being single and approximately 2 years of that hating the world and all men. A year ago she started to come out of her fog and began going out lots more and meeting new people through friends she was introduced to a lovely man who she hit it off with straight away. They are now engaged and so happy.
There are awesome guys out there you just have to keep looking.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2010): Darling... 80% of people cheat. Doesn't mean they will once they get with you. Work out a bit?
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (2 September 2010):
 It's all about weeding the bad ones from the good ones. Dating was like conducting a job interview...go out to dinner then unleash the questions and rate them mentally on their answers. If they did great they would get a kiss at the end of the night and I answered the phone when they rang for the second date. However, if they failed in every which way then they got a hug at the end of the night. Bad break-ups and years of doing this then I finally found my husband. The break-ups you learn to get over quickly you get immune to them after a while. Just know the more time you spend grieving on the bad break-up you're spending less time putting yourself out there trying to find your soulmate. There are good guys out there, but they're well hidden. Actually, there are a ton on here asking questions everyday and often getting their heart broken as well. The only thing you can do is try you don't have to sleep with everyone of them. Take a risk, that's what life is about right?
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