A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:NOTE: This has been posted before. Apparently poster didn't get responses or would like advice not given before.I’ve been dealing with a recurring challenge in my quest to find a romantic partner, and I’m seeking some guidance on how to navigate it.To provide some context, I’m a 35-year-old, black male, 5’9, who has never been in a romantic relationship. While I’ve been described as kind and nice by many, I’ve encountered obstacles that seem to hinder my dating prospects. Firstly, I work at a comic book shop, and although I’m passionate about my job and aspire to become a comic artist, it’s not perceived as a financially stable or attractive career path by some. Additionally, I currently live with my mother, a decision I made to manage my student loan debt while contributing to household expenses and responsibilities.Recently, I’ve been informed that my lack of dating history is a cause for concern for some individuals. I’ve even been labeled as an incel, which is both hurtful and bewildering to me. I genuinely desire to explore romantic connections and have made efforts to put myself out there. However, I’ve encountered consistent patterns where the individuals I’m interested in either lose interest, are unavailable for dating, or view me solely as a friend.Despite attending events like comic conventions, where I hope to meet like-minded individuals, I’ve faced similar challenges. Many women I encounter at these events are either already in relationships or uninterested in forming friendships. I’ve also attempted the approach of befriending someone first, but often find that once they enter a romantic relationship, our connection fades away.I’m reaching out to seek advice on how to overcome these hurdles. Are there specific places or activities I should explore to meet potential partners who share my interests? Is there a particular approach I should consider adopting? Additionally, I wonder if my age and lack of dating experience are contributing factors to my struggles.Any insights or suggestions you can provide would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your time and consideration.
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male
reader, kenny  +, writes (17 May 2024):
 Firstly don't take what people say to heart, I know its hard sometimes. Your lack of dating history is no-ones business but yours, just treat it like water off a ducks back.
Dating or finding a romantic partner is not easy and you will encounter people that are taken, people who are not into you, or people that will just ghost you leaving you wondering what's going on.
Its good you try to meet people at comic conventions, I would agree its good to meet people with like minded interests. If there are any other hobbies you have go to these too.
I think its important to not show desperation when trying to meet someone, a potential partner can sense this and can be quite off putting. Just be calm, laid back and what ever happens happens.
Your age and lack of dating experience are nothing to do with you finding it hard to meet someone. Sooner or later you will meet someone on the same vibrational frequency a you are and you will be bowled over and it will feel great. Remember people are attracted to our vibrational frequency, if your emitting happiness, positivity, joy, you will attract the same.
Relax with the whole thing, I guarantee that you will meet someone. I know its all to easy to feel you are left on the shelf, you will never meet anyone. You have to stop thinking this way, and tell yourself that you will 100% for sure meet someone, and probably when you very least expect it.
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