A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I Have boyfriend who i have been with for two yrs and we have made it threw a lot of hardships our relationship is falling down the tubes, he wrecked my car just the other day we have been arguing non stop even before he had wrecked my car , i honestly feel he liked the fact that i depended on him, when i met him i had to start from the ground up no car no job barley a place to stay , Well i moved up in my life got a car got a job then a promotion to assistant manager, and ever since those things have happen we have been having issues, I have been talking a lot to my ex boyfriend he the only ex i talk to, and he totally gets me i look to him for advice i actually feel like i can talk to him about anything but he lives far away in a different state but i always have to make the effort with him when it comes to things, my bf and my ex are completely different , everything my bf falls short on providing in the relationship my ex does not, what my ex falls short in a relationship my bf does not, The reason why me and my ex bf broke up was because i cheated on him, I was at a very low point in my life cos i had just lost my dad and i went on this binge of drinking and doing pills and then came the night i cheated i regret it everyday.what the F do i do? i Still miss my ex , I'm starting to hate my job actually my life up here should i leave or should i stay i don't know what to do.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2011): Breaking peoples belongings is a sign of control and a sick mind,not love. It could be you messed up with your ex and it was a mistake,but he will always know what you did and he may be a lot different towards you now. Get to the bottom of his thoughts before anything.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2011): Move on from both. The ex is unlikely to trust you,past events show he wasnt right for you. The car vandal is something that you need to keep at a safe distance. Dont go back to that sicko whatever you decide.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2011): Anyone who wrecks your car is nothing more than a nut case and will do more damage so watch your back. The other: If you have cheated,it is unreasonable to expect things to go back to normal and its likely trust is gone forever. You would be better starting from new and if someone is good for you,for whatever reasons, do not cheat or your relationship will end or become abusive. As for the car wrecker,that is an act of anger and shows he probably resents you having anything he fails to achieve, and you dont try to destroy peoples property or keep them down. If things have been done to you anonomously you know who it was now. Relationships are not about rivalry,you work together and should be happy for your partner,not resentful. The first sign of a loser.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2011): Well, the likelihood of your ex wanting you back for the right reasons is tricky...after all, you did cheat on him. Maybe you need some "alone" time to reflect and get to know yourself before venturing off into a relationship again...even if it is with your ex. If you don't take time for yourself, every relationship you get into is not going to be successful.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (27 January 2011):
Why not get rid of both men and focus on your own future. You seem to be relying on men too much for your own happiness. Your current boyfriend clearly isn't making the mark now, and isn't what you want.
But, at the same time, your ex is an ex for a reason. It wasn't working with him either, and you wound up cheating. You don't even know your ex's reasons for being here. He might only be interested because you've suddenly become successful.
Forget both men, and focus on your own life. Don't rely on men to make you happy. It won't work, and you'll just continue to be miserable.
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