A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: This guy wants me to be his girlfriend but I do not want a boyfriend right now. I just went through a bad breakup a few months ago and I am just chillin' for now and living life. I am kinda attracted to him, but he is over 10 years younger than I and kinda immature. I have kissed him a few times and "made out" but not had sex. I only want to kiss him because I am not ready for sex with anyone. I also REALLY miss kissing and crave that even more than sex mainly because my last boyfriend would have sex but never kiss me. I was STARVED for just a passionate kiss. It is weird to just want to kiss this new guy with no sex? Can anyone relate either?
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immature, kissing, ready for sex Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Kawika +, writes (5 March 2008):
Well, unfortunately I can't explain the tendencies of your other boyfriends, but I think in general men do like to kiss. Well, at least I do, especially in the course of lovemaking. But, I also enjoy kissing in a way that expresses my affections. I guess everyone has there own individual ideas of what constitutes being affectionate vs. having sex in the realm of kissing. Personally, I love both and I believe there is a difference.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionKawika: you say kissing excites the hormones in men and makes them want sex. What about with women? In my experience it works for women a lot more than men. Your statement does not make sense in my case: my last 2 boyfriends would NOT kiss me (EVER) though they wanted to have sex with me all the time. We NEVER made out, even during foreplay, though they were oral on the rest of my body. It was torture for ME to just have SEX and NOT KISS!!! So now I need to ONLY KISS as that is what I crave. I am sexed out but STARVED for real kisses. And YES Eve this guy is ok with the fact I am not ready for sex yet. He is a cool guy and not demanding.
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (4 March 2008):
The very fact you've "made out" with him might get him thinking if you were to become an item and be his girlfriend then more could happen so you need to make it clear to him. Kissing is a wonderful way to show your partner how much you care and in a way I think it is even more intimate than sex...
Let this guy know your intentions and how you feel, tell him you want to take things slowly with him and don't want to jump into an intimate relationship (ie sex) with him too quickly. If he does have true feelings for you then he'll be happy with it and wait for as long as it takes.
~Eve~
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionLucy, that was a great response. It's cool to see that you can relate to the lack of kissing thing. Yeah it sucks! Thanks again for responding!;-.
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A
female
reader, Lucy2118 +, writes (4 March 2008):
I feel like guys think sex is all girls want, so they don't kiss any more. All i used to get was a peck from my ex boyfriend. Which obviously wasn't enough for me. Sex is less passionate without kissing, when kissing involved it makes it more inimate. I don't why guy feel like they can't kiss anymore cos every girl likes a good snog.
X
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A
male
reader, Kawika +, writes (4 March 2008):
I don't know. There is something about kissing that excites the hormones in men. We tend to want more...and more...and more. And then, we want sex...sex...sex. It is complete torture to a guy when you start passionately kissing a man and then you say...Okay, Goodnight. That's MEAN. lol :)
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