A
female
age
36-40,
*ancakes
writes:i met this guy on a lame site. well he messaged me saying he is also new in the city and that he didnt have friends, and i am in the same situation. so we talked. i learned that he is looking for a long term relationship, which he mentioned on his profile, and i was just looking for friends. eventually he asked me out and i never meet with people online but i did with him because i could tell he is sincere and nice. he paid for dinner and was a complete gentleman. we went out for a couple more times. and everytime we're together we both have a great time. last time we went out he invited me again for another date, told me that he is attracted to me, and he started holding my hands. he even brought me to his moms house. i didnt want to assume that he liked me. but i was just going with the flow. then suddenly he disappears. and im utterly confused. i dont know what happened. i realized i liked him coz i missed talking to him. after 5 days he calls me,. apologizes and tells me that he realized he isnt ready for a relationship and he felt that he was moving into fast and he didnt want to lead me on to a relationship that wasnt ready or even hurt me..he also told me that he wanted to finish school first before going into a serious relationship. and he is a very goal oriented person. he knows what he wants. i know that he wants to make a lot of money in the future coz he told me before, and he says that he can only start that when he graduates. and he is really serious about getting it done. and although i kind of believe him, could it be that he is just too nice to say that he just doesnt like me?i realize i like him a lot. he told me we could still hang out like before. but as friends. that is all he would want from me, he said. ive grown to like him a lot. the more i get to know him the more i feel drawn to him. he is responsible, mature, goal oriented, neat, a gentleman, humurous. everything i want in a guy. he's the kind of guy i would want to be with in a relationship, and ive only had one bf for 6 years. dated 3 guys. and from that, i know what i want. is there a chance that if we still hang out, he might still like me? or should i just cut off everything? i have never had such a good time with anyone else ever. i just think it would be a waste if i didnt do anything if there might still be a chance. but if not. why force it. thank you.
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female
reader, pancakes +, writes (25 March 2008):
pancakes is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your answers. right now, i dont even know what to say to him. and i dont know if ishould even call him. because before he is the one who always calls me and keeps in touch. now im too shy to make a move. scared that i might scare him away-- even as friends.
A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (25 March 2008):
He could of very well wanted a serious relationship and thats why he wrote it in his profile. Then it became real, the chance to have one and he may not of realised until it started that he may not be able to cope with all his studies and stuff and have a serious gf.
If you think you could handle staying friends then it could be a good thing to do as later down the track maybe something could happen with you guys. But its ok if you feel it would be too hard.
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A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (25 March 2008):
 Stay his friend for a few years.
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