A
female
age
30-35,
*appy_Heart5
writes:Last night I made a silly drunken mistake with a best friend meaning things could be over before they begun with the guy I've been seeing who has now made it official.Do I tell my new boyfriend about this? Or hope he won't find out?Okay, so P; my new boyfriend. Before we made it official I was seeing him for a good few weeks, I've been to his, watched him play football, been clubbing with him and his Mom, he's came to ours, we go clubbing together and bars. We've had some brilliant times. He has started coming out with me and my friends too. One of my friends, lets call him N, is very close to me. We go college together and see each other lots. We are very close but by no means do I like him in that way. When I went to P's he invited N along. He left early. He always says to me if it wasn't for P I'd be with you. The frustrating thing is P hasn't asked me out or spoke to me about us. Even though I make it obvious that I like him. So I've asked the question 'will anything ever come of this', he said he hopes so but is quick to change the subject. Slowly we've not been speaking as often and have gone for a week without seeing each other. He's been away on holiday for the past week. I've not seen him for a while and contacts cut short.Me and my friends went clubbing for a friends birthday. Me and N were both drunk. One of P's best friends said 'N really likes you you know, you're wasting your time on S. I ask him about you but he doesn't respond. He's quick to ask a girl out if he likes her.' Me and N went inside he said he loves me (he always says this) I love him too as a friend. Next thing I know we're both kissing inside the club. All our friends are cheering. I think P's friends all seen us kiss. After this I text P, I asked if anything was ever going to happen, and if not we should quit, so we don't hold each other back' He then said he wants something to happen and asked whether we should make it official. Now we're together I wouldn't dream of kissing anyone else. Do I tell him about this or hope that none of his friends seen?Please help I feel so angry with myself :(Thank you 3
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (14 April 2012):
 If it happened before you started dating your current BF I don't see why you have to explain it to him. It was a mistake from BEFORE you dated.
Now if he asks you, you can tell him that you made a drunken mistake with N and leave it at that.
A
male
reader, Dataluke +, writes (13 April 2012):
 Its a bad thing for anyone to hear, but it would be best coming from you.
P's friends will probably have seen what happened and they will tell him. There version could be much much worse.
If you tell him, you can tell him the absolute truth and let him down easy.
Either way he has to be told, it isn't fair for him not to know.
All the best, Dataluke
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A
male
reader, punksavage  +, writes (13 April 2012):
 Yes you should. Trust is the key ingriedient to a relationship but trust is earned not given. So how to earn it is by being honest. Honesty comes first in any relationship therefore if you tell him what happened he will be angry and he may trust you less but not neer as dammaging if he hears it from someone else.
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A
male
reader, Capri2  +, writes (13 April 2012):
Well, you weren't in a relationship when you kissed N. So, are you afraid P will be mad if you tell him? Just to make things clear, it will be better if you tell him. Because he could think you kissed your friends after going official with him.
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