A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I like my teacher, is this totally wrong?I don't expect for him to ask me on a date. I know its illegal. and its not like i want to go out with him or kiss him or anything! i sometimes blush when i talk to him and idk why! and i sometimes get kind of nervous around him. like what would i do weird around him that would say " i have a crush on you" I told my friends a while ago that i have a crush on him, but then i told them i don't anymore cuz they thought it was weird and they just think he's playing with me... my teacher is like 27 or something like that but i know for sure hes NOT in his 30s. and i wrote a paper about our favorite subject and i said that i use to HATE social studies and then he made me LOVE it and that he is my favorite teacher. and ever since i wrote it and turned it in to my L.A teacher hes like tried to kind of get my attention. idk how to explain it, but he was just tell ME to have a fabulous day or something like that or he would be like hello!! to me and smiles ( and his smile is so hot!!) idk if hes like that because im like one of his favorite students or that do u think i like him? and what do people do when they like a teacher? like me blushing, does that say that i like him? cus im not sure. He knows that I like him. He can tell by the way I act. I smile at him all the time and every time I hear his voice. He asked me did I like him one time and I shrugged my shoulders because I didn't want to admit it. But then a couple of months later I told him I love him. But he just plays with me and calls me girlfriend. I know hes not serious though. He tells other people that I like to get attention from him. I just smile and feel Happy no matter if hes yelling at me for doing something or not. When he yells and looks mad I just think he's cute. He told my friend he doesn't want to be mean to me because he doesn't want to hurt my feelings. He's nicer to me than anyone else. He lets me get away with being tardy or not doing anything sometimes. When I told him I loved him he started telling me to bring my work on time because I love him. Or to come to class because I love him. I love him and is that ok?
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female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (11 November 2009):
 http://www.dearcupid.org/question/the-truth-about-teacher-student-relationships.html
Have a little read of this first - it is a pretty extreme story but it just shows how dangerous flirting with a teacher can be.
Ok so in terms of your question - yes it is ok to have a crush on a teacher, it is very normal and if you search this site you will see that lots and lots of young people get a crush on a teacher at some point in time.
But what is not ok is telling him you love him (you dont love him, it is just a crush) and flirting with him. While he might be young and cute, he is still in a position of responsibility as a teacher to provide education to you and be a positive role model to you and other students. If he abuses his position of responsiblity i.e. flirts with you, initiates physical contact with you, pursues a relationship with you - then he will lose his job, be put on a sex offenders register and will never be allowed to work with children again.
If you carry on the way you are doing now there is a chance that the principal of the school might notice your flirting, or maybe one of the other teachers (or even students) may notice and report him for inappropriate behaviour. How would you feel if this happens and he loses his job because of you?
You are technically still deemed a child until the age of 18, and you have to understand that this teacher is an adult so in the eyes of the law, an adult flirting with a child who he is responsible for is a very bad thing indeed.
What you feel is a crush - you find him attractive but that is all. Real love is when you know someone inside and out, when you are so close to someone, when that person knows you inside and out too and they love you just as much. So this is just a typical teenage crush, you really should not be telling him that you love him because it isnt true.
I suggest you just keep your distance a little bit from this teacher now and allow your crush to fade, this is nothing you should be pursuing and will only cause problems for both of you.
I hope this helps and good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2009): its totally ok to have feelings for him, and thats something you cant control. you just have to know that it would be innapropriate for anything to happen between you, and it could cost him his job. and if you care about him, you dont want that. just dont mislead yourself, or talk yourself into thinking anything is going to happen, because to me it sounds like he's just flattered by what you told him, and respects you enough to, as you said, not hurt your feelings. and it sounds like he's using the fact that you like him to get you to be a better student, and i think thats really cool. so basically, yes, its ok to like him, but nothing more.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2009): Oh wow, hah okay well first let me say I've been in your shoes having a crush on the hot young teacher. I used to fantasize about him, but I never went on to saying I love him or whatever. You can't help the way you feel about someone, but I think what the teacher is doing is kinda inappropriate. He's flirting with u and if it continues into something physical it'll end badly. When ur a grown woman and still have that crush on him go for it, but while ur in school and he's ur teacher...I think it'll be best to not do all those things...
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