A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My name is Trevor, 35 years old and Black and unmarried. In 2000, my father, then 57 years old started an affair with Asma, a 19 year old married Indian woman who was divorcing her husband. After her divorce my father spent a lot of time with Asma. A month later he introduced Asma to my mother who was sickly and could not satisfy my father's sexual needs which Asma did. My mother agreed my father could continue the affair. A few months later my mother died. My father treated Asma as his wife although he did not marry her and did not have any children with Asma. My father died in March this year. Asma was very distressed and lonely. I comforted her. I am very attracted to Asma and have told her that I want to marry her but Asma feels it be wrong for us to get married as she was my father's wife for almost fourteen years. Would it be wrong for me to marry Asma.Trevor.
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affair, divorce, mistress Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (12 August 2014):
 Asma has said no to marriage so the question is pointless. She is not going to marry you.
She was your father's wife in all but legality. Just because you are attracted to her does not mean she will reciprocate. I do think it's questionable for you to try to force something on her, she's essentially your stepmother.
Find another way to deal with your grief. Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2014): It would be weird. Not only that, but she doesn't want to marry you. End of. You can't force her to.
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