| A
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Help, I love my husband but have a huge crush on one of my friends. I am tempted to cheat only because my husband cheated on me, but Im not going to act upon those feelings I dont wanna stoop that low; the problem is everytime I kiss my husband I am wishing it was my crush
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2010): 'I am tempted to cheat only because my husband cheated on me'...
odd, that. And doesn't make sense, if you'll forgive the observation. There are plenty of posts on DC from people who've been cheated on and they DON'T feel any need to settle scores by having revenge flings. What you're saying is that you wouldn't be in any way tempted to cheat if it wasn't for the fact that your husband has already done so. Are you really sure that's the case?
Now, if you think that his previous actions have basically given you a licence to do whatever you want, feel free to go ahead and do it, but it doesn't sound like a recipe for a long and happy marriage. 'He did this so I did this so he did this'...where's that going to end up?
'everytime I kiss my husband I am wishing it was my crush'...right, that leaves you two options. Either carry on as you are, fantasise about the other guy to your heart's content while you're actually with your husband, and perhaps the crush will fade with time. Or, go ahead and do it, but be aware that this will have consequences and could seriously wreck your marriage. Already sounds like it's on a slippery slope.
And I absolutely accept that his having cheated deprives him of any right to seriously complain if/when you do the same. But if your marriage matters to you, you'll need to put some serious work into fixing it, and jumping into bed with your crush isn't the best way to go about it.
Hope it works out anyway
A
female
reader, theaboo  +, writes (10 August 2010):
 I thought I could get away with cheating because my boyfriend slept with one of my friends.. but when he caught me text messaging my ex.. he kicked me out of our house. Seems unfair, right? So, don;t cheat.. cause he'll blow it out of proportion.
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