A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey. I have this big problem where my girlfriend thinks that i'm completely different from her and is better for us to be apart(which i don't agree at all). She really loves me and I do too and it will devastate her if we were to be apart and she thinks it's the best way.I would say that i kinda have the dull and boring personality. The last time that i talked to her which made her pissed of me is she told me about her ex. I must say that she spilled quite alot and that she doesn't want her ex and she's moving on and all and all I said is i'm happy for her that she's moving on and I appreciate what she's doing. But then she says, "is that all you have to say about that?" and gets mad at me and didn't wanna talk to me. I'm quite confused by the respond. What were I supposed to say? Am I being plain?And so far i'm thinking that she was saying the truth that we talked shit like how's your day, what are you doing? It's just the same old stuffs. I mean, what do couples talk to each other if not that kind of stuffs? I need some help to improve..! What am I lacking?I'm completely confused, hate and mad at myself for treating her like that and now she doesn't even wanna talk to me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2010): If she is talking to you about her ex, then she definately still has feelings for (even if she is talking negative) about him dont think that its your fault at all she is the young she expecting you to be her "comfort" and is only getting upset because shes not over her ex boyfriend. Shes overly trying to tell you that shes over her ex which clearly means shes not, i would honestly run in the other directions its you its her and probably no matter what you do she is still dis satisfied. If she was over her ex she wouldnt even mention him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2010): Being female, I know that we women rarely know or even understand what we want.I'd suggest that you leave her to calm down and just give her some space for a while..In the meantime, you should know that although she may make you feel like its your fault for the way she is feeling, you definitely shouldn't feel like you need to change who you are to make her happier!The best thing to do in situations like these is to listen to your heart and decide what you really want. You should ask your girlfriend to open up and tell you whether she feels the same way.But overall, you should do the most loving thing - if you are both unhappy then you either need to communicate a lot more or consider your girlfriend's option of being apart: No matter how devastated you both might be by it at first, it might be better in the long run.Good luck whatever you choose to do!
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A
female
reader, mezzo_soprano_reader +, writes (10 January 2010):
 Alrighty, buddy. Just calm down and think about the events leading up to you and her being together. What was it about her that you liked and why did you want to ask her out? Or did she ask you out? There must have been something where the both of you had to have clicked. So retrace your steps and think. People in relationships don't just automatically become different just because now they are no longer single; in fact, she's actually in the wrong to get so easily mad at you. Make her understand that if she wants more of a response from you, she needs to tell you from the beginning. And you should try harder to listen to what she's got to say and make her feel better. And the same old, same old WILL happen if you guys see each other on a regular basis. Just make the dates super exciting then! :3
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