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female
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*ixie
writes: im badly in love with a boy and weve done things together but he still loves his ex (who isnt interested in him). My mates dont like this boy so I havent told them how i feel about him they have no idea how i feel neither does the boy know i love him. We're always going out places together. I dont know how to tell him i love him or how to help him get over his ex because if i cant be with him i just want to see him happy because hes so upset please help me i dont know what to do.
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female
reader, Raver Angel  +, writes (19 November 2007):
 Well, if you want him to get over his ex, just give him some time to ease up, and be very understanding. Just listen to him talk, and make good communication throughout this chat.
Tell him you love him when the time is right, when he is ready, or soon to get over her. It will take some time, so be very patient.
If, in the end, you do tell him you love him, and he rejects you, well, don't be mad, love is waiting for you soon enough with someone who really will love you for life.
(If you don't like what advice I gave, please don't take this serously, I am only 13. O.o)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2007): Wow.. very interesting what RCN reply. I am actually in a similar situation and I am so glad that you ask a question that I can tottally relate to. The difference is that you are just starting and mine is a long one. My boyfriend and I started to see each other seriously about 3 years ago. He had talked me that he had broken off with his girlfriend and that he had no feelings for her. But, he actually had not broken off with her and he still had feelings for her. According to him, he had talked her that the relationship did not work but felt guilty about all the things that he did to her. He cheated on her not only with me but with other women. However, when we decided to have a serious relationship the arguments between him and his ex seems to go on forever. I stood by him 'cause I thought that he would eventually get over her and that we could have a healthy relationship. But, these three years had been the worst of my life. Witnessing quietly their break up was not easy thing to do. It was quite painful, 'cause you feel so left out, like he does not love you 'cause he is suffering for her. And, you can't understand why he had to talk to her at all and why is he suffering for her when you are with him. Why can't he love you...??
The point is that you have to be honest with him, and you should demand honesty from his part. From my experience, I would give him some space. Maybe, if I had given my bf space, I would have avoided all the headaches.
I know is no easy thing to do, belive me, I could not do it. But, in a long run is going to be better for the two of you. Give him a couple of months, and let him come to you, don't look for him then that way you are sure that he really wants to be with you.
As per my realtionship, I am still so insecure, and afraid that it is not going to work; and he still talks to his ex. and we have fights about this issue. she seems not to move on, which is quite a problem.
good luck and give us an update
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A
male
reader, dapone 1  +, writes (26 October 2007):
 hi.
he is already in love with his ex,only a crazy person would get involved with this relationship, weather she loves him or not is nothing to do with it, he loves her and your coming in between that is a like a rail crash waiting to happen, give him space, give him time, then see what happens, in the end he will know he is making a mistake, then you will be able to help in through the hurt, then you can tell him what your true feeling are.
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A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (25 October 2007):
 Then why don't you tell him how you feel. Let me tell you something. I still love my ex. I can't, and won't be with her, but I love her. I always will, we'll always be good friends and there are always certain qualities that I'll adore that she has Does that mean I can't find love with someone else? Not at all. The chapter in my life with her is closed, but will always be treasured. If I met someone new and fell in love, that would be a new chapter, and new experiences, and just another treasure to add to my life experiences.
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A
female
reader, Msblessed +, writes (25 October 2007):
 i know you love him but the best thing to do is to leave him alone and let it be.Whatever is meant to happen will happen because you can't force him to be in love with you maybe he just needs time to get over his ex
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