A
female
age
36-40,
*igress Diva11
writes:I've been dating this guy exclusively for 8 months, I lost my virginity to him, I absolutely love him, but he doesn't feel the same.He says he is confused, he says half of him wants to be in a relationship with me, and the other half wants to see other people. He also said that my feelings or the thought of hurting me, stops him from seeing other people. What should I do? I tried giving him space, but we both go to the same university and are involved in the same organizations.
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male
reader, Prophet7 +, writes (16 May 2009):
You can't make someone love you and want you exclusively. The other person has to want nobody but you. It sucks because sometimes the ones we love don't return the emotion to us. I think when we find people who possess many qualities we look for and fall for them we fool ourselves into thinking they are the love of our lives. When the relationship ends we are still standing there willing to try and work on things and the other person is out living it up, usually with someone else. Don't settle for this man. If he can't decide if he want's 100% of himself with you and not anyone else let him go, but on your terms. He will not commit if you allow him to be with you while he is trying to decide. I predict he may already be looking and possibly talking with others while he is trying to decide. You don't want to be an option. If he finds someone he likes better you'll be dumped and left picking up the pieces of yourself. He doesn't love you, if he did he would not want anyone but you.You said the only reason he will not leave is because he knows you will be hurt. One day he will care more about his feelings and the new girl and not your feelings. I know you love him but you can't be a happy person right now knowing he may want to see others. Do yourself a big favor and end it on your terms before he breaks your heart. If he really wants to be with you he will return wanting to change and be better for you. Then you can take him back on your terms. If he doesn't come back, good. There are plenty of men on our heavenly fathers planet earth who will love and appreciate you. If this relationship fails you will be fine but make sure the next man you fall in love with(there will be more who you'll love) is in love with you. If you both love each other commitment will be no issue. Concentrate on your studies. Hope my advice helps you. God Bless... Prophet7
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