A
male
age
30-35,
*EP
writes:My girlfriend and I have been going out for about three or four monthes now, I love her to death, I'm in love with her, she's the most amazing person I've ever met, and we live about 4 1/2 hours away from each other, and I recently told her all the things in my past, which wasn't easy to do at all, but this is more of a psychology question, why do random thoughts pop into my head??? and why can't I control my own mind?? some thoughts pop into my head, and they're thoughts I'd never think of otherwise, because one is of my amazing girlfriend getting hurt because the tv show I was watching put the thought in my head, and I haven't been able to get it out since monday, and this thought scares me, I don't want that to happen to her AT ALL, I'm scared something is wrong with me, and I'm also scared that whenever I see her, I'll forever assoctiate that thought with her, and I DON'T WANT THAT!!! How do I control my mind and thoughts and what kind of subcontious thing is this??? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): Relax, this is normal. It's amplified for you because of the distance because you can't see her every day and see with your own eyes that she's fine. Your mind is a mysterious powerful thing and you can't really control it. But you can try to change what its focused on maybe. When those thoughts get in your head you need to just stop and tell yourself no. You KNOW it's not real, it's just in your head but you are probably feeding into it and letting this idea build and grow. You imagine all the details of it and keep it going. Instead you need to develop a tactic to switch your brain's focus, you can count maybe, or imagine a certain place you really liked in detail such as what the weather is like, what color the building is or the flowers. Tv and movies are violent now a days and it's common for us to get involved in them and associate our lives with them, honestly that's what makes good fiction. When this happens just try and switch your focus to something else. And relax there is nothing wrong with you, it's common to worry about the people we care about, but you have to tell yourself that she's fine.
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