A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My gf cheated on me. Im 18 and she is 16. We had a long distance relatioship for about 6 months now, and she lives about 3h by bus from me, but in another country. We had a great relationship and could talk about anything, it was almost prefect. She alyways said that she loves me to the sky and I always told her that I love her and care for her. We couldnt really see eachother much because of scool and other stuff but every time we saw eachother it was amazing. She even spent 6 days with me in my house. She was the first girl Ive kissed, but she had previous boyfriends. We saw eachother 4 times maybe for few days but we talked on MSN and Skype every day and exchanged buch of SMS every day. We didnt sleep together but we were always talking about it and we planned to do it next time we see eachother. When we were startin out she said that she would never cheat on me because she not like that and she could never find someone like me. I told her I would never cheat on her and I never did. She always told me how faitfull she was to me when some guys were hitting on her in the club. We had our rough times but we managed to solve all of our problems. I was always worried when she told me she was going out because I knew she was going to drink and I was affraid that she could do something stupid.One week before we were supposed to see eachother she was invited to her best gf birthday and I've got a text message from her saying how she cant go one without me anymore and that I need her tonight. I replied that we will see eachother in 7 days and that she doesnt drink, but instead wait for me to come and we will drink together and that I love her. After that, she did not replied anything. Tommorow afternoon I've recieved a txt msg from her that our relationship is not going to work and we are both suffering. I calmed her down saying we will be able to see more after I start going to colledge. She replied a similar message like the first and I tryed to calm her down again. Then she send me to come to MSN and that she must confess me something.She said that she got drunk and kissed a friend of hers girlfriends boyfriend, that she was thinking of me all the time and she thought that it was me but when she realized that it wasnt, she chased him away. She claims that it meant nothing to her, it was just a kiss on the lips, and that she loves me, and always will. I said that its over and I never want to see her again, talk to her or have anything with her. She said that she will come to see me again when all this settles down, but I said I never want to see her.I love her so much and Im suffering but I cant think of anything else but her kissing that guy and destroying everything we had. I did everything for her, gave her everything and pleased her in every way. What should I do? I beleve that she will cheat me again if I give her the chance even though she said the she would never do it again. She also said that whe will quit smoking 3 times but she smoked even more. I cant trust her like before. Am I too hard on her? What am I doing wrong?
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cheated on me, drunk, kissing, long distance, msn, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you. I am trying with all my might to do just that. She is crying all the time. It was a just a quick kiss on a party when the light was turned off and everybody did it. She said she did not initiated it but she didnt push him away instantly and that was why she fealt like she cheated on me. Her friends were to blame too I think. They dressed her up the way she didnt really like, and set up the whole thing. Her friends dont like me at all but still, she is the one that failed the test of staying true. I still dont know what is going to happen. She wants me to come to her place and she doesnt want to come to me because she cant look anyone she knows here in the eyes. I would feel like a fool to come to her, but still I will think about it. Tnx
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2007): Hey. I also have girlfriend and I'm afraid that this will happen too. I trust her a lot. But I think that I found out what the problem is. In my situation, it was her best friend. She didn't like me and always wanted to do something against us, that we split up. My girlfriend also realized by the time that her best friend isn't what she thinks it is, and I feel much more "secure" now when she hangs out with other friends. I can't really tell you how you should behave now since this has already happened to you. Give it a week, think about it. It this "kiss" passes you, try to get your girlfriend back. Tell her that you still remember about that, but you forgive her for that. If you really want her back, you really need to put a lot of time and effort to show her how you still love her. I hope I helped you.
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