A
female
age
30-35,
*weetie35
writes:Dear Cupid,I love two very different men. One is my boyfriend guy #1) of 1 year and 3 months, and we are very serious. He has talked about marrage and having a baby and getting a house. We have a great sex life, i can always talk to him, hes my lover, boyfriend, and best friend. The only problem is he is a singer and song writer, so he leaves ALOT and i'm lonely, and when i'm lonely i talk to guy #2. He is sweet, nice, and very funny. When me and guy #1 were in a huge fight, and he wasn't even in the same state, i thought he broke up with me. so i went and hung out with my friend and guy #2. Now i did somethings i fully regret like kissing and flashing guy #2...and yes i told my boyfriend because i dont think couples should have secrets...he took me back. I stop talking to guy #2, untill recently and its like i'm fallen for him...its so hard to be around him with out me doing somthing stupid like flirty with him HUGELY! I know he loves me too, hes told me before how he loves me and he wants me so much, but he wants me to be happy and he doesnt care if he has to be in pain for my happiness. Guy #1 my boyfriend doesnt want to lose me...he doesnt want me to leave him, and i dont want to but i want both in my life at the same time but my boyfriend HATES guy #2 and i'm kinda not really "allowed" to talk to him. And it hurts me...and i really have no flippin clue what to do! any ideas or suggestioins???????Yours truely,Lost Linds
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best friend, broke up, flirt, kissing, love two, sex life Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Sweetie35 +, writes (9 June 2010):
Sweetie35 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all, but coming to find out guy #2 is a jerk. He is actaully obssesed with me, and truthfully i'm very scraed of him now because of stuff i found out. Guy #1, my boyfriend, he loves me. And he forgives me for doing this, yes i'm going to have to work for his trust again, and prove to him i make him happy all the time like he does me. And i'd rather be fighting with him then being in guy #2s arms...i reliezed that today. Thank you all For you're help. Because it also helped make my desicion, guy #1. My Soon-to-be Hubby. and the lonely thing, i'm going to fix that with hanging out with my friends, who are girls, and have fun. Because i support my best friend and i dont want to hurt him again. Thank you all.
A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (8 June 2010):
 Imagine this, what if you left guy1 and went to guy2 seriously. I'm sure you would miss guy1 intensley. We all want what we can't have and you will be with the one you really want to be with. The grass is not always greener on the other side. I had a situation similar to yours before i married the man i loved. I liked the attention from guy2, he was romantic, the stolen moments were wonderful. I'ts not the real world. I learned that you can achieve real fulfilling love with only one person. You know already in your heart who can give you what you want. Ditch no. 2. hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, Empressjai +, writes (8 June 2010):
 Here's what you do...get some clarity into your insecurity issues. You only fell for guy2 bcos you were lonely and wanted some attention.If you and guy1 was that serious you would not have gotten involved with guy2. You claim that guy1 is your lover, boyfriend, and best friend, he's a singer who is out making an honest living. This is how you treat your best friend you betray them bcos you're lonely!! As soon as guy1 turns his back you find yourself in the company of another man whom you knowingly flirt excessively with. This isn't a case of 'love the one your with' it looks like a case of 'love the one your near'. What if your were the singer out there making a living an guy1 did this to you. Got hooked up with some girl bcos he was lonely, how would you feel?
You thought you and guy1 broke up and you run to guy2. Guy2 tells you he loves you...how long has he known you to ascertain that he loves you. What does he love? apart from the fact that you're not his gf! And he loves you so much he wants you to be happy with another man and he is ok with the pain this causes. What a load of empty words that mean absolutely nothing!! Guy1 knows you so he knows what he wants to hold on to but guy2 knows nothing and wants you to be with guy1 bcos he doesn't want you. When a man wants a woman he wants her to himself not shacked up with another guy.
You dont want both men what you want is for guy1 to give you to time and attention that guy2 gives you. What you crave is attention. But look at it this way...guy2 knows you have a bf and he also notices the way you behave with him. What if he was to get with you and one day he couldn't give you the attention and time you want..what you going to do...go and find another man to flirt with? You dont come up as worthy gf material in guy2 eyes and he won't tell you that. A man wants to have a woman to himself, a woman he can trust when he's away. You need to look at your own insecurity issues because that is what is running rampant here. This is not a case of you loving 2 guys...its about you feeling insecure and needing constant attention.
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A
male
reader, willi.joe +, writes (8 June 2010):
excellent numbering of #1 and #2!!!!
well go to #2 guy..he loves you.
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