A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This is going to be a little confusing, so bear with me.I think I like a guy friend of mine. He and I haven't known each other that long, so I can't be sure, and truth be told I haven't hung out with him all that much. When I finally admitted to myself that there may be something there (on my part, I have no clue whatsoever about his part!) I started having dreams about him. In the past week I've had three, each of them with us being together in some manner. This has never happened to me before with any other guy I've liked. I recently asked him to the movies as friends, and according to him, the reason he said no was because he had a massive hangover and blew his cash for the weekend. I wasn't sure if he was assuming I was asking him on a date... and I kind of hope that's not what was happening and that this was an excuse to politely decline my new formed feelings. I'm going to see him next weekend anyways, but I don't know what to do with this feeling in my stomach when I think about him or the dreams that have plagued my thought process! Another note to add (only known this guy for a month or two and already I have this going through my head. another problem!:P) is that I've been told that he has a huge thing for a mutual friend that he's known longer, and from what I (and others) can tell, she doesn't feel the same at all. She just likes the attention he gives her. He's the only guy I've ever been able to have a full conversation about random topics and not be embarrassed on multiple occasions. I guess the real question is, should I pursue this or throw it out the window once and for all? I just don't want to end up in the same place I've been in with other guys. I'm sick of putting everything out there and being crushed.
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female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (25 September 2011):
 Spanner28 is right. You have done nothing wrong and nothing to feel like an idiot over. Throw your shoulders back doll you are doing fine!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionLooks like it doesn't matter. I can't be "with" him. She and him are apparently a thing. I feel like such an idiot and a horrible friend right now. :'(
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A
female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (19 September 2011):
 Hi,Well, this is a new friendship in early stages. Don't make any conclusions until you know for sure. He's a single guy, so it's fair game. As fir the movie? I don't think he was rejecting you, I truly believe he wasn't feeling well, and he told you he didn't have money. Make sense to me. It's has been only 2 mos that you know him, so don't be afraid, give this a chance to develop whatever this might lead. I know you are scare of rejection, etc. But, you will never know unless you try. Who knows, you might end up really liking him, but there's also I possibility that you might not like him at after getting to know him better. Good luck
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum +, writes (19 September 2011):
Pursue it but don't invest your heart until you are sure that he feels the same way. Treat it like a friendship at first.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2011): It is natural to not want to have your feelings hurt. Take things slow at first, you don't need to rush into relationship. Take small steps, put a little bit out there and see if they reciprocate.
Your dreams are perhaps just your subconscious mind expressing a wish to be in a happy relationship, and he is included just because he is currently the most likely candidate who could fit that role.
Does that mean he will be the one for you? I don't know, no one does, and there is only one way to find out. If you like him, invite him to hang out some more. Perhaps get to know him more and see if you still like him.
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