A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I started my new college four months ago and in my class there was this guy who has caught my eye.So, after a few lessons; acknowledging that we were both in one class, I added him on facebook and asked him a question about an assignment for our subject (to be able to start some sort of conversation).I'm not sure how, but from then on we started to speak in person, and I started getting really strong feelings for him.Since then, we have become pretty good friends, we talk quite a lot when we see each-other, after every lesson together (twice a week) he now waits for me in order to walk outside together. (He used to do this with his other two friends, but now he does it with me).We have a weird sense of humour, and we share similiar interests. For example, some of the music we listen to is the same, so we acquired some song lyrics which we repeat to eachother everytime we meet.I also noticed he likes to say my name, he says my full name, sounding quite witty, and also refers to me as 'Miss *my surname*'. the problem is, he does this with other friends too.Another thing is we both have very dirty minds, and we share dirty jokes together.Either face to face or on facebook, we flirt in a funny way, but it's hard to tell how he sees the flirty jokes, I don't know whether he looks hard into them. I also try to bring the dirty jokes back to us so technically we end up talking about us two being in a sexual situation.In terms of contact, he hasn't put his hand around me, or touched my hand.We hug most of the time. he hugs other people too. He trusts me more because he knows me better now, he feels comfortable talking to me about other people he doesn't like.He hasn't ever said anything to me about any other girls. When we talk I try to make intense eye contact and it lasts a long time all the time. From what I've noticed he doesn't make such strong eye contact with anyone else, but thenagain he has more friends than when I see him with people when I'm there, so there's nothing stopping him having someone else I don't know about.He is slightly odd in terms of being OCD, he wants everything to be in its place, and gets agitated if people touch his stuff.For example, we were on a train and i tried to move his carrier bag so I could see past it and straightaway he took it and kind of moved my hand away.I know its OCD because I questioned what he did and he said he likes everything to be in its own place. Therefore, I suspect that is the reason that he may not like people touching his stuff, because in a flirty way today I took his scarf (which was on his neck) and started twisting it, he seemed slightly odd and uncomfortable, and held on to it and wouldn't let me twist it.Today was the last day of term though and he hung around with me, waiting for my friend which took 30mins, and even though I told him he could go he said he would wait (although he was getting agitated).Then we went into town and he tagged along shoe shopping with me and my two friends (he knows them also), and he helped me pick out shoes. He was giving me his opinion on which ones he liked and didnt like and took an initiative.I noticed he also brushed past me purposefully quite a few times, one of which he said he liked to annoy people by doing (brushing his bag by other people to annoy them).I dont know how many more to write, I am just so confused. I really like this guy but I'm so confused as to what he is thinking. It's so hard to tell because he is so friendly with everyone and for all I know he may flirt with me as a joke. My bestfriend says she thinks he may be friendzoning me based on the fact that he is the same around everyone and I cant seem to get an actual intimate moment with him on my own.We have very funny conversations and we have private jokes, we crack eachother up. I complimented him many times, I dont want to seem over-eager as I might just put him off but I dont want to give the impression that I only see him as a friend.I have no idea what to do, please give me some advice or any thoughts on this...
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female
reader, Speranza +, writes (19 January 2013):
HI there :)
It's always difficult to tell if a guy likes you romantically or not if they're friendly with everyone. However, i would try to flirt a little more clearly and see how he reacts. For instance, give him a kiss on the cheek if he says something cute or if the conversation goes to kissing you could say something like, 'You seem like a good kisser.' You know, things along these lines to show interest instead of just giving compliments.
See how he reacts - note his body language and what he says. This will give you a clue into what he's thinking and you'll be able to better tell if you should ask him out or not. Otherwise, if you don't test the waters well enough, you could end up making things a bit awkward. (I speak from horrible experience here, lol).
All the best :)
G
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (19 January 2013):
He's probably shy so you may have to make the first move, becauseit ssounds like he likes you.
Men have to risk rejection all the time, so now it's your time to be brave and ask him out. Keep it simple; tell him you really enjoy his company and would like to go out with him sometime.
Then when you go out you'll have to gather the courage to make a move in order to put your foot firmly outside the friend zone.
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