A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I like my best friends brother. We have liked each other for several years and we started to date for 3 monthes but then my bestfriend found out and she was angry at me for a very long time. We still like each other but i cant date him because my friend told me if i date him again she would never talk to me again. I miss him a lot and im starting to think crazy stuff like sneak around my best friends back and date him. I know that boys will come and go and friends are forever and I'm just a teenager and I'm in over my head but it doesnt feel that way to me. My question is should I go with my heart and date him despite my friendship with his sister or should I go with my consience and forget about him and move on no matter how hard it will be?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2013): She can't stop you from doing anything. You have the right to date who ever you wish. A REAL friend would not say stupid immature stuff like "your not allowed" horse poopy! Also you need to grow up also. Stand up up her and tell her that you love him and you're going to be with him. And tell her that just because your dating him doesn't mean that you both can not still be friends. (thinking otherwise is just stupid.)Make sure you don't be a hypocritical though, don't ignore her just because you're dating him, same goes for your family don't cut them of just because you're dating someone.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2013): Give things time. Your friend is also a teenager, she has a lot of growing up to do yet. She may mature enough to stop being so uptight about this situation, and allow to fall what may.
If the feeling is mutual between you two and its meant to be, there will always be another chance for you both to be together. Right now, your friend is immature, and it sounds like she just doesn't want to share you with anyone else. A bit like a spoilt brat.
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (4 January 2013):
It comes down to whether you want to date him or not. It’s not a matter of conscience because you’d be doing nothing wrong if you did date him, though if you do it behind your friend’s back that might finish off the friendship. She’s probably worried that the friendship would change if you started seeing her brother. When you went around the house, whereas before you’d be going for her, you’d probably be more interested in him and she’d be a spare part. That’s how she probably feels. If you want to pursue this, first try and talk to her and reassure her how much you value the friendship. Tell her how much you like her brother and how important her blessing would be to you. Then tell her how important she is, and promise her that you’ll spend a lot of quality time together as friends like you’ve always done. Let her know things won’t change between you. Then maybe she will give you her blessing. There’s no guarantee you won’t have to make a choice, but try discussing your feelings for her brother with her and if you are going to take things further be upfront about it, to decrease the likelihood that this will be the case, and to be confident in yourself that you’ve done right by your friend. You’re entitled to like and date who you wish.
I wish you all the very best.
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