A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: ok so i am 24 male and am going through a very rough path of life since 2 years after my breakup. i am mildly depressed and frustrated because i dont fit into the society and seem to have lost all my social skills. Leave alone women, i really find it difficult to get along with male friends and i have almost isolated myself. Though i wonder most of the time about how should i talk and what to talk, but i feel i am not bad at all in communicating(just my opinion, but i get other thoughts as well). I mean i am polite and down to earth, friendly and interested in people and most importantly LISTENING to them! but still i end up feeling weird about myself and stuck up in awkward conversations inspite of a great start! and because of this i have faced a lot of rejections, heartbreaks and ditching from people and i am used to it now.One of the possibilities i think could be that i am over friendly and over expecting due to my lonliness and and i really overwhelm people by talking unnecessary things. There is this girl who has entered my life recently and we get along so well. i am afraid of losing her as well because even though i am good and friendly to her, when i read the conversations later, i feel i am talking too much! and that whether a guy should talk that much and open himself to her like that?? and i fear she might lose interest in me soon and think i am weird and mentally sick! i dont want such an impression about me because i know its just the social dilemma i am going through!Any advice would be appreciated and means a lot to me. Please dont tell me to read any kind of self improvement books as i want some real advices from you. Thanks for bearing me. Regards
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female
reader, Aunty Susie +, writes (5 August 2011):
Whatever your interests are in life, that is where you should be mixing and making friends. Stop telling yourself that you are weird, try unique for a change, see how that fits you. Do you ask her questions about herself, or are you doing all the talking? Practice listening, it is a skill that a lot of people don't have, but is greatly appreciated. Listen and observe when around other people, it is a great way to learn how to act if you are unsure of your behaviour.
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