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anonymous
writes: I really like this guy from work. We hardly get to talk to each other as we are from different departments. I tried to get him to talk to me by sending him a couple of work-related emails. He did talk to me those couple of times and also mailed me in return. When we spoke it seemed like he was interested in me but very shy. What do I do?
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reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (14 June 2005):
 Okay, so you have tentatively dipped your toe in the water and found it to be warm. I don't think you can gradually wade in on this one, I think you are just going to have to take the plunge!
Take the bull by the horns and ask him out! What do you have to lose, really? Okay, so he may say no but it isn't as if you have really got to know him yet so you aren't risking too many emotions here.
If you feel too shy to ask him out directly ( shuffling feet, blushing crimson can make it difficult to get to the point) then email him we a fun invitation which allows him the ability to say no without feeling as if he had hurt your feelings.
Something like, "Hi Joe, Dave, Harry...insert the correct name obviously. I have a spare ticket to see Iron Maiden, Abba, Destiny's Child... and thought it would be great if you could accompany me and we could get to know each other's likes and dislikes a bit better. Free free to let me know by email..."
Or something a bit more subtly romantic; "Hi Dave, Mike, Tony. I have seen you in the other department and think we could be friends. I wondered if you would like to come for a drink with me after work and we could take it from there..."
Be a devil and strike the send button!
Good luck
A
female
reader, Wendyg  +, writes (14 June 2005):
 Maybe continue the emails, with a nature of how are you type things, what did you get up to at the weekend that type thing and see if you can get some nice chatting going along, leave it a couple of weeks of maybe nice flirting my email see how things come along and then maybe suggest hooking up for a coffee or something. If you dont ask you dont get, and as you say you are in different departments so if he shouldnt be interested then it wont be too hard to deal with. But you do say he is shy, just coax him a little let him know you are interested, slowly but steadily and hopefully you will get to hook up together.
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