A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:well this year i made a new bestfriend. lets call her "shelly". anyway she already ahd another bestfriend, who we will call " jane". anyway i has the myspace of this girl (call her claire) who was the prettiest person ever, a few years older than me. i wanted to be exactly like her. anyway i lied to shelly telling her that i was bestfriends with claire etc etc. but along the wayi was actually sort of becoming frineds with claire just on myspace etc. anyway 6 months past. and jane's sister was friends with claire, and janes sister asked claire if she actually knew me and she said i was a stalker and stuff and that shed never even met me. anyway this was in a comment on myspace. jane told shelly, and now shelly thinks im a liar. but i was so close with shelly and jane and i loved them so much and its ruined eveyrthing. and i dont know what to do. shelly thinks eveyrthing is too complicated and she doesnt know what to do either. i just want to be bestfrineds with shelly again.
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female
reader, PsyCookie  +, writes (20 July 2008):
 The most precious a guy loves in a girl is self-confidence. If someone sees that you're trying to act exactly like someone else, he will realize you have BIG confidense issues and probably back off. Actually, people in general would back off.
First of all, you have to realize that YOU are a SPECIAL person, and the things that you do is what makes people like you. I bet that your best friend didn't become your best friend just because you acted, like say, Avril Lavigne, right? She became your BF because she saw your true self and she liked that person. Please don't try to immitate someone else just because you think they're cool, because you're already someone who will be cool in someone else's book.
Having someone else trying to be like you is really creepy. I had this experience once happen to me with my best friend, who basically tried to do be exactly like me. This disturbed, not because she was trying to be like me, but because I was feeling like I lost my best friend. Please, realize you're a VALUABLE and SPECIAL person.
Now, I think the main reason that your friend is mad is because she may fear that she's loosing you. In the comment the girl said you were a "stalker", and this may have made your friend very nervous to think about. She may mad that you lied to her, but she may be madder that you're trying to change yourself. Tell her that you're incredibly sorry that you lied to her and assure her that you will not change. Tell her this for days and SHOW her that you're really sorry and that you will not change the person you are. Tell her you were confused but now you learned your lesson
Hopefully, if your friend is a true friend, she will understand you and accept you back. She's hurt and fearful of your change, so let her know that you won't.
Good luck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2008): The only thing you can do now is be honest. Hope "shelly" is a good freind. You also have to apoligize. That is the most crucial part. And you have to say it like you really mean it.
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A
female
reader, lushlass93  +, writes (15 July 2008):
 tell her the truth ypu wanted to be like claire and you were insecure about yourself then she will understand if you are true best friends then she will forgive you and forget becuse thats what true friends do for each other they forgive and forget she can help you through this just talk and tell ehr what you did and why you did it for
she might relise why and understand it all just talk to her and see how it goes
good luck xxx
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