A
female
age
41-50,
*nosgirl
writes:Hi, I wrote earlier about lying to my fiance about my age. Well the thing is I thought we'd past that, but apparently, it keeps coming up, now and then if I do anything, he suddenly remembers that I lied before. How do I keep him from second guessing me? Do you think we can work it over?
View related questions:
fiance Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, wonderingcat  +, writes (8 March 2009):
 In addition to ArmyMedic's question, ask yourself if you ever lied to him other than your age. I'm not talking about small white lies, like, saying you havent had lunch when you actually had one, or the dinner he prepared was delicious when you know it was awful kind of lies. But "real" lies, like, you had enough money to cover for your cab but you said you were broke kind of lies. If you did lie to him on more things, than yes, he may have real issues on your "trust".
The only way he can move past this is by you coming clean. All the small white lies, all the small real lies, all the real big lies. Out on the table.
Then you ask yourself, why you had to lie to him. If you and him come to an agreement that you are a habitual liar, then both of you I am sure will come to a decision on "what next". But, if lying about your age was the only lie that you "committed", only time and your honest effort will convince him that you were telling the truth.
Just out of curiosity, since I havent looked at your earlier question, how many of a difference in year was it, when you lied about your age? If it is only 1 year, yes, perhaps he is a bit over-reacting. But if it, lets say, 5-10 years, then he may think that his plan to have children and career need to be changed drastically because of your "biological clock is ticking faster" for him. Hence his not being convinced that you may have lied on other things too.
Cat
A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (8 March 2009):
 Trust is a major issue of all relationships, you have broken that trust, the only person who can sort this is him, the only thing you can do is continue to be honest and hope he forgives you.
Did you have a good reason to lie?
...............................
|
