A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: alright people so im in america at the moment and i met this really AMAZING girl problem is i told here i lived in america too (i don't know why) and now she wants my mobile number so since i live in england i think she'll notice that i don't live in america by the number.what do i dop.s. i've tried telling her but i can't, help me pleasssseee! Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, daletom +, writes (3 August 2008):
Trying to cover up your misrepresentation with some other story is the worst thing you can do. It shows disrespect for her person and insults her intelligence.
Here's where you discover how much integrity you actually have within yourself. You will send her a message something like this (Use this as a template if that makes it easier):
" Hi there, Wise Wonderful Woman
My number is cc-nnn-nnx-xxxx. It is located in the U.K.
I deceived you when I said I lived in the U.S., since I was really just visiting. It was wrong to do that.
Please forgive me. Whether or not our relationship ever goes beyond casual comments, I want to know that we can respect each other and I can be someone you're proud to know.
I truly want to hear from you. "
In all likelihood, one of three things will happen.
She may respond something like,
" ".
Yes, silence. You never hear from her again. It's probably the worst that can happen, but it actually speaks volumes about her own maturity and integrity.
Or she may reply with,
"Thanks for sending your number, but I will never use it. Too many guys have used me and lied to me. I was hoping you would be different. But I don't think your kind can change."
This may be what you most fear, but it isn't the worst that can happen. You are now wiser and more skilled in your interpersonal behavior. You actually have a much better chance of connecting with the next girl you meet, and are quite free to seek her out.
Of course you might receive something like,
"Thanks for the number!! Figuring in the time difference, when is the best time to reach you?? Sometime when we can REALLY talk?
It took a LOT of courage for you to say that! You don't know how much that means to me - so many guys think they can just use girls, and we're too dumb to know it. You're different.
I hope we can move along in this relationship - I mean, I just feel like it's safe to know you."
A
male
reader, Yos +, writes (3 August 2008):
I'm guessing you told her you lived in the US because you thought that would make it more likely that she'd have sex with you... because there would be the possibility of a relationship. She's less likely to want to sleep with someone who is going to be 6,000 miles away soon.Honesty is so much simpler ;) Just tell her the truth.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2008): tell her you're moving to england, or that you were living there for a while but now u have to go back to england! best of lucks! =)
...............................
A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (3 August 2008):
She probably won't care, just tell her. It's not a big deal. Why lie about something so small anyway?
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2008): Just tell her Chick A Do... It's really not that huge of a deal in the whole grand scale of things in this world. What is the worst she can do....not talk to you any more. If that is the case, the she isn't worth it. Just be HONEST AND HUMBLE and you can't go wrong. Best of luck Love Bug!!!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2008): u should probly tell her i mean its not a big deal....just tell her u were worried that she may have been some weird stalker lady......or just say u dont have a cell phone!
...............................
|