A
female
 ,
*iordana
writes:In the last year I have become really close to a girl I met in my local pub. We are very good friends and go out in a small group of friends every weekend.But now I'm worried that I could lode her friendship over something really stupid that I have done.On the weekend we were on a night out when we got a call to say that my mates brother (who I am also really good friends with)had just been broken up with by his fiance, so as my mate was upset about it we decided to head home. Once my mate had gotten home safely I went onto another pub with other friends, I got a call aout half an hour later from my mate telling me her brother was in a club just down the road from where I was and she was worried about him so i offered to go check on him. When I got to the club I found her brother and spent the rest of the night talking to him and letting him get everything off his chest. At the end of the night he asked me if I would go home with him (he lives with my mate) so that he had someone to talk to to (as he was angry with his sister for not going to see him at the club)he said he didnt want to be on his own as otherwise he would just end up thinking about the break up. I agreed to go back with him. When we got there my mate was home and we chatted for a bit, she then went up to bed and i went to her brothers room.At the start we were chatting about everything that had happened that night and how he felt, we also talked about some of the things going on with me. After a while the conversation got onto the topic of sex, he asked how long it had been since i had been with someone and he told me it had been 3 months.He then asked me if I had ever had a "fuck buddy" and then went on to ask me something but it seemed like he couldnt find the right words... finally he asked me if we could be those kind of buudys. I hesitated at first but I ended up saying yes as I have liked him from when I met him but we ave only ever maintained a friendship. That night we slept together twice, we both enjoyed it but have now decided that it was a one off (for now anyway)When I left in the morning my mate (his sister) called a cab for me and before I left she told me she really appreciated that fact that I had stayed up all night with her brother to make sure he was ok... I left feeling really guilty.I have told my mates brother that I won't tell his sister cos I know she is very protective of him (she is 25 and he is 22, I am the same age as him)I doubt very much that he will say anything either but I am stil so worried that if it came out she would stop talking to me.I know what happened won't affect the friendship between me and her brother but sometimes I wonder if she will be able to tell from th way we act around each other....I'm also worried that an ex of mine will find out as he also comes out with us on the weekend and recently we have talked about getting back together.. he knows I stayed at my mates house and he also knows I stayed up with her brother but when he asked me if anything happened I Denied anythng had happened, but he didnt sound as though he believed me.I know I've done a really stupid thing... I just don't know what to do...
View related questions:
fiance Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2008): I have done this myself and fortunately he never told a soul although when I saw him with a group of people I was always really wary and would move on as quickly as possible. I was terrified he was going to tell but it was almost worse because he would just grin at me in a knowing way - chilled me to my boots! This is all down to alcohol which makes you do and say the most amazing things. Be careful if you get in a situation where it is just the two of you again as there is obviously some attraction. For the moment keep away and keep denying anything happned if anyone asks. They can't prove it.
A
female
reader, giordana +, writes (17 November 2008):
giordana is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe were both sober (which I think makes it worse) I do trust myself around him which is why we have managed to be friends for so long without anything happening.I do believe that it was a one off and we will continue to be mates... but I'll have to wait n see if he tells anyone (i hope he doesnt and if i know him as well as i think i do then i dont really think he will)
...............................
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (17 November 2008):
 Don't we do silly things when we've been drinking? I suggest you have a word with your mate's brother and tell him it was a one off (not for now anyway, but for good!) and that he never mention it to anyone, especially your ex or his sister and if he does you'll deny it point blank... then just get on with your life. If he ever does let the cat out of the bag then categorically deny it, it's his word against yours. If a similar situation ever comes up in the future then DON'T go home with the guy as you know you can't trust yourself. Learn from it!
~Eve~
...............................
|
