A
male
age
51-59,
*ichael kn
writes:I've been married to my wife for 16 years and we have 3 beautiful children 16, 9 and 1. I came home from work the other day and she told me we need to talk and she has met someone else that she feels close to and would like to take it further. She says she isn't having an affair but she needs to tell me the situation. She stays at home during the day to watch our youngest and when I come home she has my tea ready and then goes out. She comes back late when I'm in bed. She says she still loves me and that its not my fault but I know deep down it is. I don't show her enough how much she means to me and just take her for granted. She has left before but comes back after a few weeks when I tell her I'll change and things are fine for a while then I get back to my own ways. The other night she came home and we made love and it was her that made the first moves when its usually me. What does this mean? Is there still hope for me? I really love my wife and want to spend the rest of my life with her. How can I win her back? I can't imagine life without her. Please help me.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2010): Is your wife having sex with uand her lover? What about STDs /HIV? Are u not concerned?
Is she a stay at home mum?
Who is this other man? Where did she meet him? Do u know him?
Stop only focusing on what u need to change. It takes 2 to mess up a marriage. Why do u allow her to go to the other man? Surely this is blatant disrespect for u and your home?
I know u want to salvage your marriage but allowing your wife to go out to another man and allowing her to come back and have sex with u, not knowing what she is doing sexually outside your bedroom.
Loving someone is one thing, your spouse blatantly disrespecting the other half, going out with another man, disappearing for hours when u come home to be with her other man, just makes your marriage a mockery.
Plse think about what I am saying.
LoveGirl
A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (7 December 2010):
 Start showing her how much you love her! Date her, give her a gift. It does not have to be something grand, just something with meaning that shows her how much you love how she cares for your children and makes sure you are happy. Something that tells her you are sorry for not showing her how much you love her.
Make her feel beautiful, devote one day from your busy life to just be with her, to spend a day with her and your family to show her how much you want to be a part of her life. Show her just how much you love being her husband. Don't stop telling her that you love her. Don't stop telling her that she's beautiful. When you walk with her, hold her hand and be proud of her.
Do this but let her have time to herself and show her that with you she can still be free because all you want is for her to be happy and you want to be the man who makes her happy do you not?
I hope that helps.
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