A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So it's been like 3 years since my ex-boyfriend broke up with me. I've been so hurt that I've been doing things that I'm not supposed to do. We've only been together for 6 months but he is my first love, on the last 3 months of our relationship we did it in a long distance and he broke up with me because of faded love and he only did it through text.I was so hurt and angry. Also, I lost my virginity to him yet I did not regret it since I really loved him and at that moment he also felt the same way for me. However, time passed by we did not talked about everything that happened although I still hear from him, he communicates with me.I try not to show him how hurt I still am, and have been ignoring my feelings when asked about him because personally I don't want him back after what he did to me. Also, I'm enjoying my life but didn't have any boyfriend since we broke up. We've seen each other 4 months ago, we were like old friends and he has a girlfriend. Things were getting steamy until we end up having sex. I know this may really sound stupid but I did this not because of lust or just pleasure but because when we were together, I realized that I still love him and how I really missed him so much. After we had sex, I told him that will be our last encounter. And I don't want to see him again. I said these things because I'm afraid I might fall for him deeply and I'm always aware that no good future will that relationship give me but he doesn't know this. Today, I'm enjoying my life but when it comes to love I don't really think of it coming my way again. We live in the same small town now and we have many common friends. It's quite hard how I try to avoid him. He's still keeps in touch but he doesn't hear anything from me. One day, we saw each other but I just smiled then walked. The day before Valentine's day, he called me but I never answered his calls because I just thought that he's been doing these things because he was sorry for what he did.But now, I'm really confused and I don't have no where to go. Every now and then I think of him even if I'm busy and been trying to divert my attention. My mind tells me not to have him back. I need help! And I don't get why he still wants to keep in touch despite everything.
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broke up, has a girlfriend, long distance, lost my virginity, my ex, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for that GeeGee225! I have been doing everything to keep him in my past for good , I know I can do better :)
A
female
reader, GeeGee255  +, writes (27 February 2011):
 Its hard to know for sure, but I would guess that you still have feelings for him because he was the first boy you ever had sex with and have contined to have sex with at least once since the breakup.I would also guess that he wants to keep in touch for the same reason. He is curious to see if you have moved on yet and to see if there is a chance you might have sex with him again.Even if he doesn't want to get back together with you right now, I suspect that he kind of likes the idea that you are still there waiting in the wings. All I can saw for sure is that 3 years is way too long to be hurting over a relationship that only lasted 6 mths.You owe it to yourself and your self respect to put him behind for good. It's time for you to heal from the pain he caused you and move on with your life.He is the past, not the future, and that is where he belongs.
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