A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I know deep down he has returned to her - but what do I do?I have been seeing a guy who I am deeply in love with. He knows I would do anything for him - but I also know that he still sees his ex and would probably like to get back with her ultimately!In the past week or two however, he has not contacted me as often as he used to and I just know (gut instinct) that he has returned to his ex. The question is - how do I find out for sure? - I cannot call his ex's house as she doesn't know about me and I don't want to be seen doing all the running as it may put him off me if he thinks I'm checking up on him! - What shall I do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your replies:- they were very positive - I will just have to wait and see what happens in the long run!
A
female
reader, Manya  +, writes (29 March 2009):
It's possible that he has "unfinished business" with his ex. He may love you more
which is why he doesn't tell you about his visits to her, if in fact that is what is happening. Life is so complicated. How well do you know this guy? Perhaps he is going through some weird work thing that she and he have gone over a dozen times and he wants just to talk to her, but is no longer romantically interested in her. Some times a guy will remain friends with his ex. Or perhaps he found out she's pregnant!! Terrible thought for you, but you have to really look at the big picture.
How do you know for sure he, as you said, ultimately would like to return to her? Has he said so? This sometimes does happen. It sounds like he is unsure of what he wants to do. Perhaps (ironically) you gave him the confidence to try to make up with her. Maybe she doesn't want to and he will end up on your door step. You might try to talk to him about why he doesn't come over
as much... I don't know if i would confront him yet. Why don't you spend the time trying to strengthen other aspects of your life, other friendships you may've neglected and feel better about yourself! Use YOUR freedom to make yourself happier and pamper yourself a little!
I hope this helps,
Love,
Manya
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2009): hun i know what u must be feeling right now but please dont let him get the better of u he will always jump between u and his exs he will never be happy with just the one women and u will always wonder whether he is with her when not with u and where he is and if hes with her when he doesnt answer his fone or doesnt reply to ur texts i think u already know your answer to ur question is he back with her or not! u know this because hes not spoken to u as much as he would off. he knows that u will do anything for him therefore he knows that u will forgive him everytime but what ever u decide whether u stay with him and put up with knowing theres always some one else or leaving him when u love him so much like u say it will hurt it wont get easier im affrad u just have to make that decision ur self i wish u luck xx
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A
female
reader, Neferterie +, writes (29 March 2009):
 Take a deep breath! What I am about to tell you may not be exactly what you would like to hear....but please just think about what I'm telling you.
Perhaps if he decided to go back to his ex then this was not a healthy relationship for you. Take what you've been given and learn from it. It might seem hard to do but try and find someone else, since he has the chance of you getting back with him seems slim.
Find someone who is worthy of your time, love and support.
Good luck on the path of happiness!
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