A
male
age
30-35,
*23cnc
writes:I'm so Confused!!!!!I recently converted to Islam, and my very best friend was the one who helped me the most with it.She's divorced from her husband...but still living with her in-laws in the U.S. (who are actually distant family)....I spend all day with her. We work at the same mall, so she usually calls me in the morning, I go get her, we eat, and then we are in sight of each other all day...and we spend as much time together as we possibly can. This is already against our religion.She's been curious about what a church is like... so on Christmas eve I took her with my family when they went to the service. When I took her home, she was worried that they would be mad she was gone for so long, and I basically comforted her and bled my heart out about everything I felt and told her she didn't have to stay there.Then she really surprised me and started kissing me. We made out and then she was kinda upset. She told me it was wrong and that we would never do it again and I agreed. Then the next time I saw her we did it again. And the next time. And pretty much anytime we're alone together.I'm madly in love with her. I've never felt this way towards any of the many girlfriends I've had in my life. I want to marry her.Tonight it went further. We were in front of her houseand she started (i never initiate it) again. This time it went further, and she put my hands on her breasts and other places...but she kept saying "NO!" and I was so confused!!! She was forcing me to touch her but she acted like she didn't want me to do it!!Then she freaked out and asked me why I did all those things and she was so mad. But she did it all!!! Then she kissed me and got out of the car and ran to her house.She won't respond to any of my texts. I'm really scared. What is she thinking and why did she do this??
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male
reader, 123cnc +, writes (11 January 2009):
123cnc is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks. I am well aware of the religion, I know we aren't even supposed to be alone together...I just can't bring myself to care. Why would God want us to be miserable??I didn't convert to Islam for her though. I didn't really feel anything for her before. We've been through so much together in the last few months..that we will never be completely separate. She was actually separated from her husband for over a year, so the divorce was merely paperwork..the emotions were mostly out of the way. As for her family...they are crazy by any standard...although they like me.She is actually talking to me again, I knew that wouldn't last...but now she wants to be like brother and sister. The problem is that I know she still has feelings for me because she told me yesterday.I have to be with her. I will be taking over the business I work for soon...I don't know what else I have to do to show her I am good for her and that we can have a good future together.I'm already there for every tiny need she has. And I don't mind doing anything for her. It makes me feel good.I want to show her I am strong. I'm really afraid of seeming weak. But I do need her. I get physically sick when I'm not around her..especially when we're arguing about something.Thanks again for your answer.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2009): Well let me try and help with some input.If She is a Muslim then the reason she ran away is probably because she feels guilty for makeing out with you and your not married. That is a big no no in Islam. Anyway if you converted you should know the rules. I must ask did you convert for you or so you could be with her? Was she interested in becoming a Christian and was scared her family would disapprove or maybe she was interested because she wanted to be with you. Thats great if your in love and only you know that but you need to sort out your spirituality don't change your Religion just to be with a girl. To get to the main point of your question she likes you and when she put your hands on her most likely in her mind thought it was wrong and then said no no out loud to her self and then tried to blame you cause like I said in her mind she thinks it's wrong. I say give her some time she in confused right now and just coming out of a divorce. Then try and talk to her agian and tell her how you feel and take everything slow. good luck and God bless
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