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female
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anonymous
writes: I am 17 years old and am still a virgin. I have told my friends I have had sex before when really I have not. I now really want to lose it as all my friends have. I guess I'm just too scared of the pain and the fact that I may bleed. Can you give me advice on what I should do and if my worries are true?Thanks
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2010): I'm 24 and still a virgin, and have long been ready but I prefer to lose it with a virgin woman 18+ because it will be win-win for both of us... rather than to lose to those that just want the glory or pride of taking someone’s virginity to look good; if you choose my way, make sure you study sex by watching it lol so you know what to do when the time comes.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2010): I am 14 i may be a bit young but i'm also scared because, im worried about getting pregnant. :(
x
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2010): hey i feel the same way as you but do it when you are ready not them
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female
reader, Annabelle344  +, writes (15 October 2010):
Hey, i think the best thing to do is wait until you know for sure you are ready. If you feel that you cant wait any longer make sure you are protected. As for the pain thing , it really doesnt hurt it just feels weird the first time. I am fourteen and the first time i had sex was with a 21 year old guy and i regret it so much. That is pretty much it but yeah it doesnt hurt
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female
reader, xMebx +, writes (20 November 2009):
In response to you question:I am twentyone years old and I am still a virgin. Although my reasons for being one may not be the same as yours, it's a personal decision. If you allow your friends' influence is not a good enough reason to have sex. If you're not ready, you're not ready. Ultimately, it's your body and your health and welfare. And honestly, it won't be that big of a deal if people find you are a virgin unless, however it's a guy and he only has one thing in my. If these people are your friends, which it sounds like they are, they won't think twice about it. They are friends with you, not your virginity. And when that time comes, you want it to be right. It's a personal experience that you will want to always remember. So make it memorable, not rushed or forced because everyone else has. Hope I helped. :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2008): I am a 15 year old virgin. Feel free to say no but i have the same problem as you and i really want to lose my virginity also. I would like to learn about you and well lose it for both of us. My penis is about 4in. long so it wont hurtbut still feel good and its about 2 in. wide. i am 62 and weigh 120, i am very smart and athletic but i don't want it to be anyone i know so its not embarassing. i know im young but think it throught i am very mature and want to help you lose your virginity. so please please please?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2008): listen.
it doesnt matter what your friends have and havent done. you need to wait until your ready! and until you've found a guy that you can trust and u can actually see urself losing ur virginity with! trust me. one day your gonna be like... i was the only virgin. and you are going to be proud that you waited. so dont do it under pressure. wait. until your ready. yes; everyone is scared for the first time.and you might be one of those people that dont feel any pain at all from doing it. and you will have pain a few times. until you get used to it. just dont worry. you need to be okay with someone seeing your body and all that good stuff. it'll be worth it if you wait too. just dont worry about what your other friends have been doing. its not about them. or fitting in. its about YOU. and ONLY YOU! promise.
hope i helped.
=)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2008): ok hun trsut me i was the same way and you know what it did hurt but like OMG it wasnt that bad and not everyone bleeds and its not like you'll bleed alot just alittle so dont worrie its worth it trust me do it you have to do it sooner or later
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2008): i would suggest waiting till u are ready with someone u like.if u really want to wait till ur married then do so but its ur personal preference.personally i think the whole waiting till ur married is cock n bull all over. i lost my virginity when i was 18, i regret that i lost it to someone who i didnt know well and didnt have feelings for. but u should live a little. prob the best age to loose ur virginity is 17-20ish as ur starting to have more mature decisions n thoughts n most likely more serious relationships.if ur a girl it is sore n sometimes u can bleed but it gets much better after that.listen to urself and ur body as its important to helping u grow and enjoying ur sex life more.im now 23 and in a happy, fun and very loving relationship but i wasnt always so lucky. remember its how u feel and listen to urself other than peer pressure mates as they can make it harder.love urself and remember always use protection to protect urself from dissappointment.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2007): You know, I was like you for a while but then I just stopped caring and it sorta just happened. I'm honestly tired of people preaching to when the right time is or why or with who, it's just sex its part of life it feels good you only live once. All these people who believe in waiting are usually the ones who want it the most. However, if you do it protect yourself kids shouldn't have kids. Other than that enjoy your life and quit asking for other peoples permission if you want it do it you know the consequences its your decision and nobody elses. I'm 20 now I had sex for the first time over a year ago. I was always told to wait for someone I "truly" love, and to me that's just a buncha crap seeing as how you could lead horrible sex lives with even someone you love, sex b4 marriage isn't a crime, all you people telling others what's right and wrong what right do you have. Live your own life nobody owns you. Although when I was 14 I was still rockin the toy soldiers but meh, different people different thoughts. The only REAL argument is hiv and getting preg, do watch out for that. The whole peer pressure thing is absurd you only ever see that crap in movies, there MIGHT be people who will mention it but I really would laugh if anyone ever tried to force anything on me. And finaly the whole regret thing, why feel regret? You knew what you were doing you're not so innocent truth is nobody lives your life for you and if you regret things like that you're just someone who honestly needs to grow up and realize sex is just part of life and not some damn holy ordeal, get over it -_- its not like anybody cares honestly. But that's just my opinion : )
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2007): dont loose ya virginity for the fun of it. and just coz u told a little lie but believe me its better havin that little lie from loosin ya virginity wen ya not ready.
u want to loose ya virginity coz ur friends have? its like this really m'dear if they stuck there heads in an oven wud u do it? heres my opinion i think u shud wait till u meet someone u really like get feelings for and not just rush into it, if ya scared thats fine, everyone practically is wid there first time, i hope everything goes well for ya.
R.Wren.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2007): before u loose your virginity u really should find someone u love to loose it to or u will regret it trust me...i do
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2007): you guys are a lil crazy about loosing ur virginity, instead of talking about sex why dont u rather take ur books and read inorder to release ur mind and body from thinkin about sex. i think u guyz are all too young to be talking about sex at this age.why dont u wait til ya married b4 u think of havin sex with ur husband. peace to yal, stay blessed. BLIZZARD xxxxx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2007): hey there
i lost my virginity when i was fourteen and honestly i regreted it, the person i lost it to does not talk to me anymore. I am 17 now and i have been with my boyfriend for 16 months, i am very happy with him and we have had sex alot he lost his virginity to me but he does know i didnt lose mine to him i actually consider that i did because i did not bleed with my first and i did with my boyfriend i have now when me and him have sex i do not think about my ex, honestly if you are looking to have sex think about it and wait till your ready you dont want any regrets but then again if i did not have sex with my first i prob would not be with the guy i am with now everything happenes for a reason so just be smart about things and everything should be good virginity isnt a tool its yours and you dont want just anyone to just have it and for the girls that say its nothing that isnt true it can emotionally hurt for alot of people. So becareful and be smart and good luck you should know the right time to do it or not
Take care.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2007): Well I'm 14 and he's a couple years older. Yes I know that's very young but I'm not stupid. I love him and I'm in love with him. I know he doesn't just want sex because I was the one who brought the subjest up. We are both virgins. Lately I really do wanna have sex with him, it's kinda scarry though because I've never really fely like this much intensity before. I'm pretty comfortable talking about it with him and I don't think I would regret it with someone as amazing as he is... but I am extremely worried about the pain. Like I've never even been fingered yet. Should I do that first? Would that help? I have so many questions about it. I just don't want it to hurt. That's really my only concern.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2007): really saying it doesn't hurts when you are in deep aroma at that moment, if you have it in a right way.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2007): Everyone says it's gonna hurt, but in all honesty, it only hurts for some people. Believe it or not, I almost fell asleep the first time. The only ones that actually hurt were the boys I was with FOUR YEARS LATER!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2007): hi there i am also 17 and a lad so theres a lot of pressure on me lossing mine and i am confused to lol maye you could give me your msn so we can talk?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2007): i'm 13 and i've lost my virginity, sometimes i'm glad i have because i wont have to lie about it if anyone asks, but sometimes its bad because i'm too young. It depends on the size of the guy as to whether it hurts or not. It kinda hurt but in a good way and a bad way. I didnt bleed though.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2007): heya theres nothing to worry about im 17 as well im gunna b 18 in a couple of months i havent lost it and i mean im interested in it i want to some days n then sometimes i dont but the fact is its your choice no one else if my mates had forced me i would have lost it by now but thats the thing people have so much more respect for you when you havent lost it or anything like that i no so many people sayin to me i wish i never lost it. and i wish i waited for the right person! its nothing to worry bout do it when you feel like you want to not when you m8s want to.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2007): hey girl
look it is going to hurt but in a good way.
plus you have told your friends if you dont get it done quick they gonna find out.
plus i am a virgin too so if you want to loose it together let me know. ;)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2007): hii am from turkey and i think that what you are trying to do now is wrong... why do you want to do this immediately?i think your friends are not your real friends, if they were so, they wouldnt mind whether you were virgin or not.and if you said that in our country, you would be killed or people would say that you were a whore..
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2007): i am a 18 goin on 19 yr old girl every 1 thinks that im not a virgin an i play along with it , when actually the truth is i am an kinda embaressed bout itto i av sorta slept with a boy but i no within my self he didnt brake my virginty as iv done other things with boys after an they really hurt. i do want 2 lose my virginity b 4 im 19 but am sorta scared of the pain (but not of havin sex)i have done every thing else an want 2 start havin sex.so ppl what do u lot think help me!!! thanx
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2007): you wont bleed,if you really want to lose it then you should,just protect yourself(condom)and everything will be fine
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2007): So, I'm a 15 year old girl. My boyfriend is 17. I've known him since I was two months old, and we fell in love. I've been dating him for 7 months, and both of our parents are hoping for us to marry in a few short years. I'm fully ready to lose my virginity to him, and I'm positive that I won't regret it. But he's a virgin too.. and I'm not sure how to tell if he's ready. Could someone please help me? Thanks.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2006): Hey there, Im a dude so take this as you will, but Im a 20 year old virgin, Im cute and slender, Ive had the opportunity and turned it down, the reason being this, 95% of people Ive talked to regarding this issue wished they had waited, almost always there are regrets, people who wished they had waited, now my advice, Im not going to preach or anything about marriage, thats unrealistic in our society, however you should at least wait until you are with a guy you really like, a good test (and this is a dirty, but necissary move for girls who want to know a guys true intentions) tell him you are waiting until marriage no if's ands or buts, after about a month or so, if oral is your style, do that, but BADLY, and see if he sticks around, if this is so go for it. But you do not want to treat your virginity like a disease and just get rid of it, everyone remembers their first time, make yours without any regret, and with someone you care about. I hope I have been of some help. ~ Chris Schmitt
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2006): i so badly want to lose my virginity but im only 13 i tihink wwe shud just have sex and get it ova and done wit cum on it will be fun
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2006): dont scared dude...YOU CAN DO IT
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2006): im still a virgin and im scared to have sex,i want to but i could only knock up the courage if i was drunk,which aint so good!!but i want to and theres this boy i aint out with but i really love to bits and just want to have sex with him,ive kissed him and a few other things but im scared,what can i do ?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2006): hi well i am 16 and my boyfriend is 17. i love him very much. we have been going out for over a year. and we have been trying to have sex for a while. all the chances we got never worked out. because i was either too tight or in too much pain. i am terribly scared of the pain. should i take a pain killer before or something? i love him a lot and i know i am ready. both of us virgins by the way... and i dont know what to do.
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female
reader, Heavens7thstar +, writes (16 June 2006):
If you are scared... Don't do it! Being scared means you aren't ready for it. Having sex in my opinion is somthing you should only do if you are in love with someone. I made the mistake at age 17 of loosing my verginity too soon becasue my hormones were going crazy. But I wasn't ready and I do regret it. I don't regret who I lost it to though. I'm almost 21 now & still regret it. Sex is somehting you really need to think about. Your friends may talk about nothing else & how awesome it is. But I bet half of your friends will regret it in a few years. They may also be lieing to you just as you did to them about loosing there verginity. Think of what could happen. You could get an STD, or get pregnant even with 2 types of birth control! & if you think your friends would make fun of you becasue you hadn't done the wild thing yet, then they aren't true friends. As far as it hurting... it didnt hurt me but I think that's because we did A LOT of foreplay before hand. & you will bleed. Not a whole lot though. Just be careful & remember it is something very special you will want to remember your whole life. Wait for just the right person.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2006): And 11 months later...
[ahem]
Wow, this is rather old...
Is this what kids think about these days? [ponders] Why did I just ask this? [sigh] So mind boggling. So cheap.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2006): I FEEL THE SAME WAY I'M 19
IF U WANNA CHAT GET BK 2 ME
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2006): Im 14 and my boyfriend is 16 and i really love him. We've been together for a while and I really want to loose my virginity to him. I'm really scared about the consequences though. I dont want to end up pregnant. I'm not on the pill and Im not going to tell my mom about wantin to loose my virginity so i wont be on the pill. Of course he will wear a condom but its still risky. I really want to loose my virgiinty to him and weve dont stuff already just havent made that final step to sex. We talk about it and he wants to do it too but it just hasnt happened. Im scared because i dont want to let him down and Im scared about how bad it will hurt... i dont want him to think that hes hurting me and hes really good about asking if im ok and if i want him to stop when were doing other stuff. I know that he will be ok with whatever i decide and i really do want to loose it to him im just scared about the pain and what he will think about me afterwards. Im only 14 and ive never used to dildo or anything.. ive been fingered before but thats it.. will i be able to take the pain and how long will it hurt after? and will i bleed?
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female
reader, playgal_p8ssy +, writes (4 November 2005):
I am the exact same but i am 15. I did once nearly lost my virginity if that is possible. I shagged this guy but we stopped because i was in too much pain. Ever since i have never had sex. I told all my friends that i shagged a guy, which is true but they assume i lost my virginity which infact is not true. Yes it hurts, but when the pain is over you get pleasure for the rest of your life, but don't waster your virginity, keep it until you meet the right guy because the pain won't seem so bad.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2005): I'm a 27 year old male virgin, I've never even kissed a woman. I always thought it was a gift but, most people don't want the pressure of being a first for a virgin imo, and especially being a guy , not many people believe me.Now all I want to do is lose my virginity. I am still considering making it special , for example with a virgin girl. How do you believe the girl is really a virgin though. They could just be lying as well. Losing my virginity is like a door opening upon the huge realm of sexuality that I long to experience. I believe I've waited long enough. My second choice would be a close lady friend. I hope I won't have to find a third or further choice.
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female
reader, honest&devoted +, writes (12 August 2005):
Listen you are a young woman and you need to make decisions that are in your best interest. Frankly I believe that having sex at this young age will result in only negative consequenses and regrets.
Value your body.Virginity is a very special thing and can only be given to someone once.
Please wait until you are older and have found someone who you believe is worth sharing this treasure with. This person should be someone who sincerely loves you and would want to be with you for the rest of your life.
Believe I am speaking from personal experience. There is nothing to gain from rushing into sexual intercourse. Safeguard youre virginity , it is your treasure. Do not be pressured or influenced by others around you who are having sex.They have a lot to learn about sexual intimacy. The pleasure may be good but you are not at the place where you are ready to share that level of intimacy and therefore truly experience the level of pleasure that surpass the physocal act of sexual intercourse.Think of pregnancy, possible miscarriages and STI's. Darling, it is not worth it.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2005): look girl that great that you are still a virgin, don't give up your dignity just because your friends have. I don't understand why you would want to lose something so precious that is for you to give up when you find the right man. let me tell you something the only thing you'll feel after having done the hanky panky is regret and sorry for have done it. wait girl until you are fully ready and right now your not since you have mixed feelings.
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reader, becky05 +, writes (19 July 2005):
You most likely wont feel any pain. It will just be wiute uncomfortable.
Do not rush into anything though, just because all your friends have.
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reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (18 July 2005):
 To be frank, you are more likely to experience discomfort if you try to have sex for the wrong reasons than the right ones because you aren't so likley to be relaxed and may not even like the boy you are doing it with.
To have sex because you feel you are lagging behind your friends isn't exactly a good reason to do it. Okay, so they have had sex before you but that isn't necessarily a sign of maturity, it could even be a kind of race to see who could do it first. Now where's the fun in that?
Think carefully about this. I hope you realise that the true reasons why you should want to make love with someone is because you feel close to them, care about them, find them attractive, love them, want to be with them...the list goes on. Is there anyone in your life like that? You see, if there was, then love making would more likely be gentle and loving and any discomfort or bleeding minimal. The more aroused you are, the less likely you are to feel any pain. You would be sharing the experience with someone who cares about you and would want to make the whole experience as pleasurable for you as possible.
Don't rush into making love with someone; that would be a mistake. If you aren't ready, you aren't ready. That isn't anything to be ashamed of. Be proud of who you are and make love for all the right reasons, not to keep up with your friends.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2005): Sometimes it seem like everyone in school is talking about who's a virgin & who isn't, and who might be. For both girls and guys, the peer pressure can sometimes be intense. In reality..it's no one's business as virginity is such a private, personal thing and no one should make you feel pressured into giving it away..just to say you did the "deed".
But deciding whether it's right for you to have sex is one of the most important decisions you'll ever make. Each person must use his or her own common sense & good judgment and decide if it's the right time - and the right person.
This means considering some very important factors - both physical ones, like the possibility of becoming pregnant or getting a sexually transmitted disease - and emotional factors, too. Though a person's body may feel ready for sex, sex also has very serious emotional consequences.
For many teens, moral factors are very important as well. Family attitudes, personal values, or religious beliefs provide them with an inner voice that guides them in resisting pressures to get sexually involved before the time is right.
Nobody wants to feel left out of things - it's natural to want to be liked and feel as if you're part of a group of friends. Unfortunately, some teens feel that they have to lose their virginity to keep up with their friends or to be accepted. Please don't allow your peer group at school to do this to you. Are they truely being sincere good friends to pressure you into making a monumental decision like this. What would happen if you get pregnant or contact a serious STD? A baby is a lifetime committment and could hinder future goals for you. An STD could cause all sorts of medical problems that could affect you for a lifetime. Please...make that decision when you are ready for it. Be smart..think for yourself. Anyone who tries to pressure you into having sex by saying, "if you truly cared, you wouldn't say no," or "if you loved me, you'd show it by having sex" isn't really looking out for you and what matters most to you. They're looking to satisfy their own feelings and urges about sex.
If you feel that you should have sex because you're afraid of losing that person, it may be a good time to end the relationship. Sex should be an expression of love - not something a person feels that he or she must do. If a boy truly loves you, he or she won't push or pressure you to do something you don't believe in or aren't ready for yet.
Last words and read this carefully. When it comes to sex, there are two very important things to remember: one, that you are ultimately the person in charge of your own happiness and your own body; and two, you have a lot of time to wait until you're totally sure about it. If you decide to put off sex, it's OK - no matter what anyone says. Being a virgin is one of the things that proves you are in charge of you, in charge of your life. And it will show that you are powerful enough & mature to make your own decisions about your mind and body. Keep being strong, girl!
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female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx  +, writes (18 July 2005):
 I think it's sad you had to lie to your friends about your virginity, as it's nothing to be ashamed about. You're only 17, there's plenty of time! I know it can sometimes seem like everyone but you has done 'it' but it's not true. In surveys on teenagers, most people, especially girls, regret the circumstances and age at which they lost their virgnity. It will be so much more special if you wait for the right time and the right person, trust me.
With regard to your worries about pain and bleeding, everyone is different. Some girls don't bleed at all, as the hymen may have been damaged by tampons or excercise. Make sure you're relaxed and comfortbale with who your're with and it feels right. This will help you relax and it will hurt less.
Don't feel pressured into losing your virginity, it is a special thing so cherish it. Make sure only a deserving enough man gets to take such a special thing from you.
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