I just turned 30, but I look very much younger, so people think I am a "kid", I am attracted to an older man, maybe in his 40's, trouble is, I don't know how to approach him, what would be your advice? |
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A
female
age
41-50,
*ake_cookies
writes:So I just reached the dreadful age of 30. I feel real weird because I know technically I have reached the age where I am supposed to be an adult. And granted I have the whole house/car/business thing so I am responsible in that end. But maturity wise I feel as young as I look (which is about 19-20). I get carded everywhere I go, even at the movies.This brings me to my predicament. I live in a small town 10,000 residents maybe. And I have recently found great interest in an older guy who I met through one of my sons afterschool sports. Needless to say, I feel weird about this new guy I'm interested in because he is early 40's. I really like him, and I'm unsure how to approach him because I feel like such a kid. I'm unsure if its because of the milestone of turning 30 or if its because being out of the dating scene for a while, he just makes me feel how I once did when I was younger. Added to that are the single/married over 40 women's pack who travel in herds and make it very known that i'm not welcome because "i'm just a child, myself". I keep away, I always sit by myself, I don't interact with any of them during practice or games ~ so of course, the gossip has started that now I'm saying more than 2 words to someone its the oh so very cute SINGLE older guy. So-technically speaking, now that I am 30 - does that mean I dont have to worry about age anymore? Eventhough I'm mistaken for younger~ if there are glares from the 40+ mom pack, I can now officially ignore because i'm of adult age which means I can date available 40yr old man? Or am I being naive to the imaginary social mores that loom in this small town I live in and should just drop it before anything starts?
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female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (24 January 2009):
Urgh, small towns, I am so glad I left.
I live on an army base so I can really understand what you mean about the "mom pack."
I am the only one without a kid where I live so I get either pitied or looked at as though I'm a freak.
I think you have to look at it this way:
You are already sat alone getting evil stares. You can stay away from this guy and stay alone and what will happen? You will still have to sit alone and get the evil stares and the gossip.
OR
You can go for it with this guy, chat to him, see where it goes etc. You'll still sit alone and get slightly more evil stares, but you'll have a gorgeous boyfriend to laugh about it with.
Shove all the other mums and do what will make you happy. Next time you are chatting to this guy then really start chatting to him and if you feel a click between you then ask him out for a coffee.
Good Luck!! xx
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