A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I recently have had a bad break up and my ex is now dating a girl and seems to be doing so well (but other sources tell me he is not). I recently found out he is saying all the stuff to her that he said to me and it's really made me feel worthless, like i was just another relationship to him, i know people go into rebounds but its just really made me feel down. I lost my jobs because i was so stressed out about my boyfriend while we were still together. And lost my job that i had about 2 months ago because i just wasnt happy and it showed, i tried my best to hide it but they let me go and i honesly loved that job, it was probably the best ever with good pay. Now for the past 2 months i've just been laying around and going out with people mostly at night to get my mind off of it. I blew all my money i had and basically dont have much left in the bank at all. I want to move out of my house. I currently dont have a job and dont plan on going to school because i just dont think college is for me. I wanted to go to specialty school but honestly just want a job so that i can move out of my house and i dont have my own car, it's my dad's car. I have barely any money saved up to buy a car that i would like so i find myself trying to dependent on a boyfriend or someone to help me out, i dont really have a lot of girlfriends at the moment as i have shut them all out, and they either have jobs or boyfriends and it just really makes me feel down, I'm 19 years old and i feel like i should have so many exciting things going on in my life, but i dont, and being around people who do have that just makes me even more sad. I dont think i need pills or anything like that. I just need some advice on how to get out of this funk, i want a job, i want to save up money, i would take up as many jobs as i could just to move out and have my own car, but it seems impossible.I'm having trouble even getting dressed and going out to find a job because my confidence as gone WAY down and i dont feel like anyone would even except me for a job as ive been fired twice, except for maybe a job at a fastfood. I just hate it i have so many dreams in my head and goals in my head but when i wake up in the morning all i want to do is sit in the house and i really do want a job but i just dont even want to go out and find one. I've tried to better my diet and everything to make me feel better but nothing seems to work. I just need some advice as how to get through something hard in your life, and how to turn your thinking around to make everything seem more positive. My parents don't help me, i could get a job with my mom but she says she doesnt want me working there, my parents just put me down and make me feel bad about not getting a job and say that they work hard everyday only to find me at home still in my pajamas i dont think im literally depressed i think that im just sad that my life isnt going the way i planned and that im not working, and going out with the girlfriends, and having a great boyfriend, and doing all of those fun things. My only thought would be to go to college and get out of here and meet NEW people but i hate college ive taken some courses and i just dont like it at all. I want to do something more my type. Anyway I'm looking for some really good advice as to how to get my life back on track again so that i will be happier and more confident in myself. I've always been confident, ever since my ex thinks the world of some other girl i just feel so lonely and that no one is right for me, i go out but I'm not happy, and I just want my old personality back. Please any advice is appreciated.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2010): 1. Make a list of what IS happiness, make life goals.2. Make a list of daily activities that reach your happiness goals3. Stay healthy; keep a regular exercise schedule and eat right4. Only choose friendships with honest, progressive, healthy people.5. Promise yourself you will stand by your rules for healthy relationships and a happy life.
A
female
reader, girl from bristol  +, writes (24 January 2010):
hi the guy is not worth feeling sad over one day you will meet a great guy i am out of work myself at the moment and it does get you fed up when u are not in work but you have to use the things you want to do as reasons to get a job gets you motivated when you will think of having your own car moving out of home i think that would be good thing to do if your parents are not supporting you maybe explain to them how you feel then they will understand and support you , getting a job always makes you feel better about yourself as you are independent and have something to focus on
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