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I just can't seem to just give up on her.

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Question - (20 October 2007) 8 Answers - (Newest, 31 October 2007)
A male United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I'm going to try and keep this short and simple. Me and ex-girlfriend were together off and on for 2 years. We had alot of good times and alot of ruffs ones also. I loved this girl and i still do. She lied about certain things sometimes(some not to hurt me) and some she should told the truth about. I treated her wrong alot during this time to but we always seemed to work it out. 5 Months ago i caught her emaling on a guy online and she lied about the whole thing. Well i got upset about this and i missed a important event of hers and since then she not forgiven me. Beginging of summer she told me she had a crush on a dude but then two days later siad they were only friends.All summer she told me one day were we done and she didnt feel the same and then a week later she would say i made the wrong choice i still need you. Well this progressed all summer until she went to college. During this whole time she had been hanging out wiht this so called *friend* a lot but she swore they were only friends. So again she says one thing one day and then the next the total opposte. Well last week she still still loves me but needs to move and be over us. So yea i was hurt but i mean i tried all summer for her so i kinda just accepted it. Didnt talk for almost a week and i still thought about her everyday and hurt but tried my best to move on. Well she came home from break and i know she was with her so called friend again. Well the other night she texts me saying they are together now but it doesnt feel right to her and it should be me and her and she doest know why it isn't and she doesnt know what she has gotten herself into. Well this felt like a ton of bricks hitting me but I dont know what to take of this. She makes it soudn like doesnt want us and i try to get over it and then she says stuff like that, that keeps me up all night thinking were goign to get back together. I dont know what to do. I love this girl, but i cant seem to just give up on her because for awhile i did treat her like shit. Plz help???????

View related questions: crush, ex girlfriend, get back together, move on, text

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A reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2007):

You're probably more likely to get noticed if you post again with a BRIEF resume of this question, plus any new stuff.

Phil

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2007):

Well my dillema just got way bigger. Can someone tell me if this like still a live post that people view or is it just in the archives. I want to know before I post my story.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2007):

Thanks for the advice everyone. It helps reading them all. Yesterday I got a text from her saying she can't get me out of her head. I didn't reply back which was so hard but I wanted to. I think of where she is at right now with another guy and think about the negative stuff she did when we were together and that usually makes me mad enough but then the guilty part of me sets in and I start to think how I treated her sometimes and overreacted on stuff. I know the past is the past and all I can do it apologize and tell her my real feelings, and believe I have. I know she still has feelings for me but I also think she messes with me now because she knows she has the ball in her court.

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A male reader, rcn United States +, writes (20 October 2007):

rcn agony auntI'd move on, talk about a yo-yo. It's almost as if she flips a coin to figure who to be with. As long as you stand by and let her bounce back and fourth is as long as she's going to keep playing this little game.

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A female reader, mizzy.mara Australia +, writes (20 October 2007):

mizzy.mara agony aunti kno exactly how u feel! im in the sort of same situation. except my guy is acting like ur gurl and im you. u dont kno wheather they love yu or not, they will tell u that they love you then next thing you kno they r tellin u different! i hav decided the next time he says that he doesnt kno if he feels the way he used to im just goin to say thats it then its all ova and done with bekoz i cant keep putting myself throu all that stuff again and again and again! its just not fair on us is it? well i wil say that next time and no matter how hard it is for me it will be the best thing for me...dont kno if you want to try that or wheather you wanna work things out with her. but it sounds like she has hurt u a fair bit ova the summer, but yea i kno its hard to try to get ova them but it is the best thing to try. okay gud luck with everything mizzy.mara xx

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A female reader, k821 United States +, writes (20 October 2007):

It sounds as if she is very confused and immature. It seems as if she wants to keep you along as well as the other guy to see which is better for her. That's not fair to her. You deserve someone who only wants you. As for feeling bad about how you treated her all you can do is be honest with her and tell her how sorry you are about it. If she still doesn't accept it and tells you she doesn't want to be with you. Then I think its time to move on and worry about yourself. Not her. Best of luck to you. I hope you get all that you deserve.

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A female reader, k821 United States +, writes (20 October 2007):

It sounds as if she is very confused and immature. It seems as if she wants to keep you along as well as the other guy to see which is better for her. That's not fair to her. You deserve someone who only wants you. As for feeling bad about how you treated her all you can do is be honest with her and tell her how sorry you are about it. If she still doesn't accept it and tells you she doesn't want to be with you. Then I think its time to move on and worry about yourself. Not her. Best of luck to you. I hope you get all that you deserve.

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A male reader, Somethingeasy United States +, writes (20 October 2007):

Somethingeasy agony auntSounds like this girl has a problem making up her mind, leave her now and forget about this unless you want to spend the rest of your life playing the I love you today,but tommorrow I dont game.

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