A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey, I am going out with a guy and I have been for almost a year now. His friends have told me that he's going to ask me to marry him. At first when they told me I was really excited about it because we were both really into each other, but now when I think about it I don't really know how I'm going to react when or if he pops the question. It's mainly because in the last few weeks I've been getting mixed signals from him - just from little things that are different about us like the way he touches me and how he acts towards me. I don't know whether I'm making a big deal out of such little things but it doesn't seem like things are the same. I've talking to him and some of his friends about it but it just doesn't put my mind at rest. Should I break it off with him if things are not how I want them even though he might be happy with things as they aee? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (30 May 2007):
 I agree with DV1, it sounds like he's probably really nervous!! I'm to understand that he doesn't know that you know? Well, think about it from his side of things... he's thinking about asking you to MARRY him. That's a big step, that's a huge commitment, a major decision. He's probably trying to make SURE that this is the right time, and try to feel you out and trying to figure out the "right" way to go about asking.
If you love this guy and you want to marry him then be patient. Don't rush him... he'll ask you when he's ready. If you're having second thoughts and you don't know if you really want to get married, I would bring it up. Casually. You don't need to say:
"Hey darling. I know you're wanting to propose, but I'm gonna say no. So... glad that's cleared up."
say something casual like:
"You know, I really am enjoying our relationship. I'm really glad that we're taking things slowly and not rushing. I'm just enjoying getting to know you better..."
Or something. You know?
But if you do want to marry him, be patient with him and take into account that right now your boyfriend has a LOT on his mind.
Congratulations, sweetness!
xxIndia
A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (29 May 2007):
 He's probably been nervous! I imagine that he's going over 80 million different times, places, and ways to pop the question. He's probably overthinking everything, because he probably wants it to be perfect, and therefore may seem deep in thought lately. If you don't know if you're going to say yes, don't give him the thought that you would. Indirectly bring up a conversation, and relate someone to how you wouldn't want to get married...
Dv1
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A
female
reader, candy00s +, writes (29 May 2007):
 Maybe you need time to think about what you want out of this relationship, are you ready for marriage?
Have you thought he was changing towards you after you learnt he was planning to propose to you?
If you arent happy with the way things are then take time to think about it.
Marriage is a big step - you could have a long engagement to make sure you are doing the right thing.
xx
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