A
female
age
41-50,
*erby
writes:I need advice on how to deal with an ex who I work with at weekends.I thought when he ended things with me that would be the end of us as a couple but he keeps confusing me by his actions while at work.So basically this is bit of history on us. I have to work with my recent ex in my weekend job. The two of us met at work and were friends for a long time before anything happened between us, I never realised he had feeings for me until he went on holidays got drunk and told me and we took things from there. He admitted that he had been too shy to say anything to me previously as he thought I wouldn't be interested in him (apparently I way too good looking for him).Things were going really well until about a month ago when he had some bad news about a family member and he lost his job. He started to act like a totally different person not affectionate, not talking to me for days (he used to be the one to contact me every day a few times a day). I left this carry on for a bit putting it down to stress he was under but it continued for a few weeks and eventually I asked him what was going on. He told me that he just couldn't do a relationship with all that was going on with him and that he was sorry for the way he treated me but it meant everything to him that I didn't hate him after we broke up.It was fine with me to be on speaking terms since we had to work together every weekend but in the past couple of weekends he has been acting like he was when he was trying to get me to notice he was interested first time around. He goes out of his way to interact with me and joke around with me. If I'm not paying him attention he does something to make sure I do notice him and have to speak to him. He used to always wind me up to get a reaction before we were together which he later told me was because I was very cute when I was wound up and he did it deliberately and last weekend he spent all night trying to wind me up and joke around with me. Also the other night my attention wasn't on him so I didn't notice him standing behind me then I felt someone blow on my neck and when I turned around he was walking away and looked at him and started smiling at me. He's also told a mutual friend that he knows he's an idiot for letting me go but he doesn't know this friend has told me this.We agreed to be friends when we split and I have text him once or twice outside of work and he always responds straight away but as we are only friends I don't feel I should contact him much as I would have thought if he wanted to talk to me he would contact me away from work.I just don't know what to think and if I'm overthinking the way he's acting at work imagining he's flirting with me when he's not. Can anyone tell me how to deal with him and if they think he may still have feelings for me or if he just being friendly for work sake. I just need advice on how to deal with him at work so I can move on cause I was really hurt when we finished.
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at work, broke up, drunk, flirt, I work with, lost his job, move on, my ex, on holiday, shy, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Lola1  +, writes (8 September 2011):
 It's possible he still has feelings for you, but I would not act on them, if I were you. He hurt you at the end of the relationship, so he should work to get you back, and make his feelings clear... if that is in fact, what he is hoping to do and assuming you'd give him a second chance.
Good luck, enjoy the attention and play dumb!
:-)
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