A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi AllI Have a few Dilemma's in my life right now.Been with my Boyfriend for a Year and Half, And it has been the best year of my life. Im now Pregnant and Looking Forward to becoming a mum. We get along great,Always tell eachother everyday that we love eachother, there is just one problem i wish would just go away then everything would be happier, I Have Trust issues, and its a very big problem, although i have got better but it has took a long time and alot of fights and arguments for me to realise i cant keep doing this, It was the final straw last week when i finally opened my eyes and realised im pushing him away, he was so close to walking out the door and leaving me, but i begged him to stay and clung onto him telling how much i loved him and that i will change for now on. I accused him alot, questioned him, and got into emotional moods because i kept saying he has been cheating, and i nearly drove him away by it, basically this is my last chance, next time he will leave me. i have trust issues because my first love hurt me and lied, now i think all men are the same, apart from deep down i know my boyfriend aint like the rest, also im not blaming my mum but i grew up with her accusing my father of things, do you think that rubbed off on me? im not sure. i dont want to be like this, i have got better which is a start, i dont accuse or question him anymore and got into moods, but i still have thoughts going through my head sometimes. he is happier with me now that i have got better and he knows im trying hard, but im scared incase i start it all over again, its weird because i trust him but then there is a small part of me that dont, i know that people say if you aint got trust, you got nothing, but he trusts me 100% and i trust him 50%. i just wanted some helpful advice on how to keep getting better and to never accuse him again, its just the hardest thing i have ever been through, can you please tell me how to get more trust back, and if anyone has been in the same position as me and got through it can you give me some advice and your story. i really need to get better for the sake of me him and the baby, i cant lose him because im so in love with him. please help Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2010): Hey honey,
I used to be like you always feeling stressed and wondering how it will feel if I find out my Ex is cheating.
My Dad sat me dowm and said, stop running these thoughts thru your head. Just sit back relax, if something is going on like cheating, it will come out.
Initially it was very hard to not start the accussing conversations but it was a bad habit and just needed to be broken, I sat back and watched everything believing IF ANY WAS HAPPENING IT WOULD COME OUT.
You need to stop the arguing as you will be a new mum soon and your baby deserves to grow up in a stable environment.
Otherwise you could always get counselling.
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