A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Myself 22 year old, I never asked this to anyone coz it's too weird but I want to ask you.I have sexual feeling for my mother since I was very small I use to smell my moms clothes left in the bathroom like her bra and panty I didn't know about masturbating coz I was too small, her body odour turns me on I love her body smell a lot I dont know why, and I had a habit of sleeping with my mom since childhood, I used to hug her from behind while sleeping. Slowly as I grew up to 14 or 15 I guess I started moving and pressing my penis towards my mom's ass when she was asleep and I began to feel good, that's how I learnt masturbating, well when I was 16 my mom started avoiding me and told me that I could hug her in sleep but to keep my legs at a distance as she was feeling uncomfortable , sometimes I still tried to press her back but she always got up and told me to move a bit away , I am 23 and my mom is 46 now and I am not sleeping with her but sometimes do hug her with love, But the lust for her is still there and I keep on masturbating with her bra and clothes. I try to get her off my mind but still I can't control myself, it happens again and again plsssssss tell me what to do? plssssss help
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2009): Sorry but your mom is the one to blame here. She should've not allowed you to sleep with her when you turned 8 or so...whenever boys start to get erections. You need to distance yourself from her. If sex happened, you would be disgusted with yourself and your relationship with your mom would always be awkward. Mother's are supposed to be protective of their sons, and this is wrong. I think you should move out of the house and find your own place. Only then you can move on with your life and develop true feelings for a special woman to love.
A
female
reader, didda123  +, writes (21 January 2009):
 Well this puts a whole different slant on the situation unless you are having us on!Are you honestly telling me that you are pursuing a sexual relationship with your mother and she appears to have little objection at this stage - and you at the age of 23! I think you need to set some boundaries asap i can't imagine what your father would think of this situation if your mother was to tell him. Do you have any younger siblings? I am just wondering if she still sees you as a child not the grown man you have become. I have 15 and 18 year old boys i am very loving to them as they are to me but in a totally motherly way i remember when they were small and would often have a bath with me but once they started to become aware of our physical differences i had to draw the line no one seems to have done this with you.I think you should speak to someone professional, forget the book i mentioned earlier because this is something you need to address sooner rather than later and im sure they will have heard of your problem before.Don't go getting into bed with your mother again you need to set yourself some boundaries if no one else is and even your mother may be shocked if you push the boundaries too far and im sure you don't want to risk upsetting everyone.Maybe the girlfriend you had just wasn't the right one for you im sure it will be much healthier for you if you start socializing more with friends and eventually you will meet the right girl who will press all the right buttons.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for ur answers everyone, there are somthings more i did like to discuss-
i do have a father with me & i love him alot, Well i did stop sleeping with my mother when i was away from the my family for my studies for 4 years & i didnt even masterbate for 4 whole years i did get wet dreams but never felt to masterbate in absence of my mom, i did get a girlfriend for myself when i was alone but i never got sexual feelings for her,now i am back to my home & things are happening a bit different than before, first i thought i cldnt sleep with my mom again as a 4 years have passed out without doing that so it wouldnt look good, everything was going normal my dad leaves office early morning and i usually wake up late, i began to get up early & went to my moms room & massage her head as i usually use to do in past, slowly i have reached to massage her waist her hands & even her ass but she never utters a word this motivated me to sleep behind her again & i began to ly behind her & doing it step my step i came back to my same position what i use to 4 years back but now somthing differetn took place as i slowly began to touch my pennis to her ass during her sleep after a min passes she responds to my pennis by pressing her ass towards it , she presses it hard than leaves it for some seconds & presses it back again this goes on for a while till we both get asleep, but its happening everyday & when its happening i even tried to put my lips on her neck from behind & i did it & she didnt utter a single word than too, well i didnt mention this all before but i wanted u all to know the present situation...
and one more thing i dont know why i dont get sexually attracted to any girl but only my mom.. plssss do reply on this situation...
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female
reader, didda123 +, writes (18 January 2009):
I believe this is a common feeling for young boys growing up though usually it would have been resolved by the age of 5.
Freud explains that the young boy as love for his mother which increases greatly around the ages of 4-5 to a point where he wishes to possess her sexually! The boy sees his father as a rival for his mother's love and developes a fear that his father will castrate him (castration anxiety) as Fee-Fee mentioned earlier this is called the Oedipus Complex and boys all go through this stage of development according to Freud.
I think your problem has arisen as you probably have not had a father figure in your life so have never had to learn to distance yourself from your mother.
I am sure you can overcome this worry with the help of a psychotherapist or if you find that a bit daunting try reading a book on Freud's Theories of Socialization try Beginning Psychology by Malcolm Hardy and Steve Heyes just reading it will help you to understand all the processes we go through whilst growing up and it is very interesting if nothing else.
I know this is only one theory but it just shows you that you have had normal feelings just yours has gone on a little bit longer than most boys.
Hope this helps good luck.
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female
reader, aunty_rach +, writes (18 January 2009):
also i think it would of helped if you had stopped sleeping in the same bed as her when you got to about 4 years old. a 16 year old in the same bed as the parent, is just not right. there are no physical boundaries! like i said before...get professional help. also moving out from home would be an idea. get your own space and be away from your mum at night. also go out and meet people, meet a girl. you obviously need to get out and meet people. you're spending too much time with your mum. it;s not healthy and it;s not normal to want to press your penis against her ass and feel her pants! get help!
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A
female
reader, aunty_rach +, writes (18 January 2009):
i was going to mention Freud, but someone already has. to be honest i can't stand anything about Freud and believe it is aload of old rubbish. such as men being powerful because they have a penis! please! anyway back on subject, i think you need to get some professional help. it may not be sexual at all, it may be that you have some insecurities and issues that will be sorted out by talking to a therapist. there's no shame in seeing a therapist, they are there to help after all.
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A
female
reader, Fee-Fee +, writes (18 January 2009):
 Freud calls it the 'Oedipus complex' after the Greek mythological character Oedipus who killed his father and married his mother, albeit unknowingly!
It is actually a fairly common thing amongst male babies and toddlers - the idea that a boy's mother is the standard as it were for all future relationships ... how many times have we heard that a man marries a woman who turns into his mother!
Your mother was your first source of nourishment, and your first point of care and contact, arousing feelings of love, safety and trust which are of course essential in a loving relationship.
It is a really complex thing - I have a grasp of Freudian theory but it would take probably months to get to the trigger and root of your particular complex, and I am also not qualified to do so!
I would suggest you go and see a psychotherapist.
This is by no way a slur on your mental health, it is just a therapist will be able to explain it to you and spend all the time you need to work through the complex.
Fee
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2009): Move out!!!! Get a girlfriend
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2009): i don't think it's uncommon for something like this to happen, accept the fact that your mother obviously never set physical boundaries between the two of you. it's not unnusual for sexual feelings to develop towards peopel you are close to, if you spend a lot of time with them, and are sheltered from others.honestly i think this is a very important issue you should discuss with a therapist, but putting distance between yourself and your mother might help improve the situation. a lot of confusion arises from males with no father, who are very close to their mother, especially, i think, in only children it's not your fault, but this can only cause you pain and mental anguish. the thing to remeber is that although the brain is a key factor in sexuality, the body doesn't "know" the difference between someone on the street or a family member. when i say distancing i mean physically. start trying to associate sex with someone other then your mom. masturbate while watching porn, with women your own age. do not masturbate with her clothing. it will only worsen the situation. go out and interact in romantic enviroments with other women. once again i think you should see a therapist. they deal with situations like this all the time, and won't think badly of you. it appears to be a well kept secret in america that unhealthy feelings do arise for those that are close to us. i wish you the best of luck, this must not be easy for you, and it took bravery to post this.
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