A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey,I'm so confused and just lost all my confidence :(A guy i was with for 4 months recently text me asking to go on a break as he said he cant cope being in a relationship atm as hes got 4 jobs and just needs time by himself which i thought fair enough but just wish he would of talked to me about it first. Then a week later he text me splitting up with me, i couldnt believe it, i was so gutted. The way he went around it was all wrong especially by text i thought i deserved so much more than that. But i thought if he doesnt wanna be with anyone atm then theres nothing i can do.But 2 days ago i found out hes now with someone else and im totally in bits :( I just cant get him out of my head.
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female
reader, SeaShell +, writes (10 December 2008):
Finding out 2 days later that he's with someone else just shows what kind of idiot he really is.
Don't beat yourself up about it as you've done nothing wrong, he's wasted your time and now that your free from him you can do whatever you want.
Spend time with family/friends, people who really care about you and do things you enjoy like going out or hobbies.
In time you will find that someone who will truely love you but for now just take care and look after yourself!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2008): Look at the bright side: You're lucky enough to rid yourself of a coward and cheater. (Yes, I'd consider it cheating because from a similar experience, my ex had a "new" girlfriend five days after we broke up. Well technically he didn't violate any rules, but I wasn't convinced that he had the time to meet this new girl, get to know her and everything in just a span of 5 days.. and right after a breakup. It must have already started when we were still together.)
Here are some tips that might help you bring back your confidence:
1. If there's one person who ought to cower and be ashamed, that's him. He may have been the one who initiated the breakup, but consider it a mutual decision because I doubt that even you would want to keep a guy like this anyway.
2. Remind yourself that before you even met this guy, you got on with your life quite well. You did it before, you can do it again ;)
3. DON'T compare yourself with that 'new' girl.. she'll be just another victim. Besides, people have their own strengths and weaknesses which makes it unfair for you to regard yourself this with a low esteem when I'm sure there are things that you are better at which a four-month guy would not have known.
4. Hang out with your friends. They can offer you their shoulders to cry on.
5. Do stuff that you love that can comfort you.
There :) I know you can do it. I got over my ex bf with whom I was with for over 2 years and who broke up with me last August for the same dumb reason. The memories still come back, but it's okay because now, my strengthened self can handle them well :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2008): if he's going to treat you like that then he's not even worth thinking about, you deserver better than that!
join a club, something that you enjoy doing, it will take your mind of things, its also a great way too meet people and make new friends and it will boost your confidence at the same time.
go out with your friends at the weekend or have a girly night in with your friends. going out shopping seems to help my friends a lot when they're having problems with their boyfriends...
really just keep yourself occupied and fill your life with as many activitied as possible, you'll forget about him in no time and i'm sure you'll find someone soon who will treat you right.
feel free to message me if you need someone to talk to
good luck, i hope you feel better soon xx
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A
male
reader, SinVA  +, writes (10 December 2008):
It will be better. The break is still fresh in your mind. Just realize that this guy is a duechebag who couldn't even give you the courtesy of splitting with you face to face. You are better than him, so stop feeling bad over this break. To get your mind off him, occupy yourself with more activities, pick up a sport, join a club, do something that gets you out and meeting people.Slowly you realize you are going whole days not thinking about him, and one day someone new will come into your life and you will be so happy you lost this asshole months ago.Goodluck, i felt like trash after my ex of over a year split after cheating on me. I still have days I feel bad and think about her, but getting out and doing things makes you feel better. And anytime you feel bad, come here and someone will help you.
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