A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I met a guy a month ago and, although we can't see each other very often (as he lives too far away) we get on really well and I think I'm falling for him. He's Italian and very passionate so we've already made love and he's expressed his love for me. It doesn't seem too soon and, most of the time I'm really happy. The problem is me! We text and chat online (as well as talking on the phone) virtually every day. My problem is I worry too much everytime he doesn't call or get in touch. I always assume the worst. I have horrendously low self esteem and feel very lucky that this gorgeous, attentive guy has chosen me to love. Consequently when I don't hear from him my first thought is always that he doesn't care anymore. He has no idea about this (I wouldn't want him to know how insecure I am) but it's driving me nuts! Why can't I just relax and stop assuming the worst all the time? Does anyone else do this?Any advice about how I can chill out would be very welcome! Thanks! x
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx +, writes (7 June 2007):
 These are obviously problems with you that need addressing before you ruin what could be a really big chance of happiness for you. You've probably wrecked so many things throughout your life because you don't believe in yourself and this has to change.
Why not get something counselling to try and get to the bottom of why you feel this way about yourself? Was it something that happened when you were a child? Was it a past partner? Something must have put you in this mindset and you need to find out what it was so you can deal with it and move forward with your life.
I really feel for you, we all feel low about ourselves sometimes. But when it's causing us so many problems and ruining relationships we cherish, it's time to do something about it. Get some help and advice so you can move forward and hopefully make a success of it with this guy. Good luck
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