A
male
age
41-50,
*ommy2k7
writes:I want to know what people think of the year I've had (relationship-wise); it would be interesting for me to find out:It all started very well in January when I was going out with a girl who lived in Yorkshire, but after 2 months, she cheated on me (she was 18, I was 27 at the time, but that shouldn't make a difference).I spent the next couple of months crying to my friend on the phone every night, we'd spend a cple of hours each day talking!I then contemplated suicide, started harming myself, and doing things that weren't 'me'. (She was my first girlfriend)I felt torn apart and my heart ripped to shreds.I met another girl in May - also 18 when I met her - but she also cheated on me after she couldn't get sex! She tried to change me, hurt me (her mum, when I met her, even asked me if I intended to have sex with her daughter!). Then she said I wasn't good-looking enough for her, she kept texting me after that saying that the men she went out with kept on dumping her; finally I had enough!I still want my first gf back now, but as the year ends, it will get easier, as she told me the second week of January (they'd been going out since December!) I don't know why it will get easier after January, maybe because a year has passed and I wont be saying 'this time least year...'Just wondered what people thought of my 2007
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female
reader, Midge +, writes (11 December 2007):
 I can understand where you are coming from. There are a lot of people out there though that have had a rough year and have chosen to rather learn from the experience though rather than doing something silly. I'm not judging you though!
I have been having a rough few years having my identity stolen in 2005 and the courtcase only having come up in November 2007. Having the banks at my door constantly telling me that I hadnt paid my mortgage when my mortgage was with another bank altogether and the property address that they had was for a house over 300 miles away from me. It came out eventually that these people had bought a house in my name and just didnt bother paying the mortgage. My credit was ruined to say the least and I have just had a lot of crap dealing with solicitors/banks/credit companies etc. Over the few months that I didnt know about it, they managed to spend over £125k in my name. Now the banks want their money. My solitors fees have been over £25k, so yeah, the last 3 years have been a complete shambles for me.
However, I chose to learn from what has happened and have started to look at getting laws in this country changed so that people in my situation dont get hounded by banks etc. Let me tell you, some of the conversations I have had with some of the debt collection companies over this has been rather intense, and I have lost my temper on more than one occasion with them. The laws here protect the criminal and make the victim the criminal.
I have taken something that is bad and made it into something good. You can do that too!
From what you have said, you havent had much luck with the girls but why are you in a rush? You are still young and have so much time to find Mrs Right. When you try rush it, thats when you make mistakes and trust people that dont deserve trusting! Just be cool and take it one day at a time, and Mrs Right will one day just walk into your life and everything will be good.
I also think you are aiming way too young. Go for someone in their 20s at least. 18 is too young and a lot of them dont want a relationship, they want to party. They dont want commitment just now, they want to have fun and freedom. Freedom to do as they please, with whom they please!
You havent had luck in the love department, but other than that, your year hasnt been too bad. It will soon be another year, and another chance for you to find Mrs Right, enjoy it!
A
female
reader, deejuliet  +, writes (11 December 2007):
 I, too, had a rough year. I have been going though a nasty divorce for almost 2 years. My ex was supposed to pay the mortgage while in process, but chose not to, so now my home is being foreclosed on. He tried to have me arrested multiple times and reported me to child welfare services. I was cleared by everyone and praised as being a good Mom and told not to worry about his antics, but it was scary to go through. He did get a restraining order put on my current boyfriend by lying to the courts so that he couldnt see my kids for several months until I was able to get it dropped. He demanded a full trial (how many people do you know that actually go to trial for divorce?!) and we were in trial for 2 months and I spent about twice my anual salary in attorney fees for the trial alone! I was told my job may be eliminated and my son was diagnosed with ADHD. I could go on! It has indeed been a very rough year. But now I am finally divorced and moving on with my life. He is still trying to screw with me, but things are getting better. I have my health. I have sole custody of my children. My ex went to jail for a week for purgery (hehehe!) and I got the house. It means I got the debt, too, but the equity outweighs that. Life moves on and it will get better. Life will get better for you, too.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2007): January the appointment came for my abortion told my partner that I was going to keep our third child. he was pissed off with me didnt talk to me after this and constantly came home late.
March found out that he was having an affair with a work collegue. He moved out we broke up!. So stressed hair fell out. Found it difficlul looking after are other kids.
April Found out that he was seeing this girl after following him to work. He denied this.
May - Daughter born premataturely due to stress and pre-natal depression. 2 weeks later he admitted that they had still been seeing each other. Said he wanted her to meet our kids.
June. Postnantal depression kicked in
July - finally accepted my daughter
September they broke up he asked for me back.
November - he went back to her and they are now happy together.
It seemed alot worse when I was going through it but now it doesnt seem half as bad. Roll on 2008 and Good luck to you. x
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A
female
reader, Fairy_Lu +, writes (11 December 2007):
 Wow your 2007 is nearly as bad as mine this might make you feel better, january found out my ex of 3 years posted dirty pics of me all over a webiste also found out when i moved back home that he had sold loads of my stuff, then 3 months later found out that the enitre 3 years he was sleeping with someone else, then met a guy who was amazing but then my grandad died and 4 days later the great guy dumped me by text because "i didnt seem happy" hmmm i dont think this year was very good for many relationships
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A
female
reader, cheryluk24 +, writes (11 December 2007):
 I am sorry to hear the year you have had it sounds awful.
If your in a relationship no matter what the age if she truly cared then why did she cheat and also for the things the other girls mum said bout not being good enough for her daughter was out of lline and no one has the right to judge another person and looks shouldnt be an issue i think you need to move on i know it can be hard but you deserve alot better good luck in whatever you choose to do.
xxx
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