A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: i have been in love with my best friend for a few years now and i hate the fact i have to feel this way. you can't help it. it comes naturally. we have known each other for over 7 years. i want to tell her how i feel about her but im terrified of how she is going to react and things will change between us. what is the best way to tell her? She is in a complicated relationship at this point. Could really use your input. thanks
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female
reader, oliviababes  +, writes (20 October 2010):
 i think you should tell her your feelings for her, if shes that good a friend she won't hate you if you do it! xxx
A
female
reader, Princess_Rae +, writes (5 October 2010):
 Anonymous,I am going to disagree with TimmD on the first obvious question, which should be: Are you Lesbian/Gay/Bi/ect? Just because your feelings for you same sex friend are strong does not necessarily make then sexual or romantic. You said your self "i hate that fact i have to feel this way". It seems you need to do some deep soul searching in yourself on your orientation before you proceed to express your feelings to your friend.If your are not gay, but this friend is your "one exception" then you should not tell your friend. It would be hard reconciling the fact that she is in a relationship, and the fact her friend, who she probably views as straight, is propositioning her. If you are indeed a lesbian, and your feelings for your friend are of the romantic/sexual nature, you then need to consider TimmD's question: Is she gay/lesbian? I suggest if she does not know that you are oriented to women, telling her that first and see how she reacts to the news. A major miracle could happen and she could be lesbian herself, and then you could tell her your feelings for her. In the very least you will know wether or not to share your feelings for her based on her reaction. Either way any emotional disclosure on your part will add a new element to the friendship. For the best or the worst, you definitely need bring this up with your friend because it will drive you crazy if you don't.I hope what every you do it brings you peace of mind and happiness to your friendship and sex life.Love,Princess_Rae
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A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (4 October 2010):
 Well, I guess the first obvious question is: Is she gay/lesbian?
Having your best friend is hard enough if they are of the opposite sex, but for members of the same sex it severely complicates things if the other person is not gay. If she is open to relationships with women, then fine. But if she has never had any previous experiences with women, I think you should probably just keep your feelings to yourself.
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