A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: So I know this is really a relationship problem, but I don't really know where else to go right now. Lately, I've been having really bad anxiety, and I'm scared to tell anyone or go to a therapist. I'm only 16, and it gets really bad, I have panic attacks. I don't know how to stop it, or control it. It's like it's controlling my life, and I can't do anything. I'll save you a big ol long story with details to explain, anyways I'm sucky at explaining things. My question though, is how can I do something about it? And if it comes down to telling my mom and going to therapy, how do I get the courage to tell my mom? Thanks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Graciejune  +, writes (17 July 2012):
Hi again. If you are interested, here is the title of the book I found so very helpful A Survivor's Guide to Panic Attacks by Bev Aisbett. Best Wishes.
A
male
reader, Htsn47 +, writes (16 July 2012):
 There are a number of things you can do. The advice the other people gave here is very good - remember that panic and anxiety mean you *feel* like something is dreadfully, awfully wrong, but it doesn't necessarily mean that's the reality. We are very good at telling ourselves stories, and believing them. I suffered from anxiety attacks too, and almost lost my wife in the process, before I realized that the panic I experienced felt very real, but didn't match my reality. I started out with some medication while I learned to meditate, which has helped. I still feel anxiety, but it doesn't control me.I don't think you should keep this inside and try to deal with it by yourself. You should try to talk to your parents, a school counselor, or a trusted adult for help. There are lots of solutions, ranging from meditation to medication and combinations of all of the above. I could not coped with it all by myself.However, if you truly won't or can't talk to anyone about this, then there are ways to deal with anxiety you could try. There are good books - your library probably has several - like The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook. Many of these start with techniques like regulating your breathing. (Try it - take a few slow, deep breaths like you are filling up your belly with air.) You can also find multiple resources online, forums, chat groups, and so on.Please don't spend your time feeling sick and scared. I know the feeling very well and its awful, and you *can* feel better.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2012): Hi - it is very, very scary to have panic attacks and knowing what to do about it, or even believing that something can be done about it can be the hardest step. Put very simply panic attacks can occur when your 'fight-or-flight' response gets rewired and works at inappropriate times making your life very difficult or unmanageable.
The main thing to know is that they are VERY common and there is absolutely no shame in having them. They can come and go or they can last for years, but it is very difficult to deal with them and get you life back without professional help.
A couple of years ago I had panic disorder to the point I couldn't function. I had six months of therapy and meditation and now it barely affects my life, if ever. But I needed to reach out and get help. All I can say is there is absolutely nothing for you to feel ashamed of or scared to ask for help. Many, many people from all walks of life have experienced it and your life can change dramatically with a little help.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (16 July 2012):
 the panic attacks can be controlled. it's not a crime to need some help.
you need to tell your mom or dad that you are having them and talk to the doctor about it... there are medications that can help, just like if you needed glasses to read... just a bit of help to make things easier...
often folks are ashamed of mental illness issues but fine with physical issues and I don't get why it's such a shaming thing anymore now that we know that most mental illnesses are neurobiochemical in nature which means it's NOT your fault...
just tell your mom that you've been feeling anxious about things too much and it's making school and friendships hard and would she please take you to the doctor so you can figure out how to fix this...
the doctor will probably either prescribe some meds and suggest a therapist or refer you outright depending on the doctor's level of expertise...
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A
female
reader, Graciejune +, writes (16 July 2012):
Sweetheart I used to suffer severely from panic attacks. I didn't know what to do and it completely freaked me out. I hated being alone incase I would have an attack. It was very scary.Even though you are scared, remember that this doesn't control you , and in time you will be able to steady yourself, slow your breathing and calm your body down. Reaching out is the first step, so well done.I read a wonderful book on panic attacks and anxiety and this helped me understand things clearly, and how to cope/deal with my anxiety.It took a while for me to regain control of my thoughts, but you can do this. If you are scared about therapy then try reading first, but please don't continue to suffer in silence if this doesn't help. Life is too precious not to get on top of this.
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