A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have a very very diverse complex mix, because of this it makes me stand out as I look extremely different from most people. My race is completely unspecific or impossible to guess. So every single time I leave my house I always have people stopping me, doesnt matter at bus stops, shopping, bars, whatever asking me "what are you" etc. Every single time I leave my house I could get stopped up to about 12 times. Alot of times I meet new people who ask abotu my race before they even ask my name as no doubt, 99% of people I meet will eventually start asking within the first 10 mins.Now before anyone goes preaching to me about how I should be proud of my heritage believe me I am 200% proud of everything about me and my family's background. I am happy being me and wont want to trade anything about who I am or where I come from,. But I am just fed up of having to explain myself, my family, my race to every single person I ever meet my entire life and quite frankly I do not see how it is any other person's business but my own. If I was half of one thing and half of another that is easy enough to explain, but because it is so diverse and there is no single prominant race it takes a long time to explain-a good 10mins as of course people always have more questions the more you tell them, and to be honest it is my business and I simply do nto want to explain to people any more. It actually has come to a place where I am infuriated and offended by constantly being hassled by people.I try politely saying I am multiracial and suggest I dont want to go into it anymore than that but alot of people can be extremely rude and will not accept I do not want to talk about it and persist even more, I have tried making up random places that seems easiest to identify to my ethnicity, I have even tried saying I am adopted but that leads to more interrogations! I mean I just dont wanna talk about it anymore - I just want to go out, enjoy myself and not be hassled. So I am just looking for POLITE or even cheeky-tongue-in-cheek-non-offensive-funny suggestions from anyone that I can try to use when I get these interrogations so hopefully get people to stop harrassing me and understand I do not want to discuss it further....I have tried everything I can think of saying but nothing ever seems to work....Sometimes people even start arguments with me if I do not want to discuss it!!!! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honor +, writes (11 February 2009):
Funny and wonderful responses that should not offend anyone. Good luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2008): Some great suggestions here - good luck
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (15 May 2008):
 Question: what race are you?
Answer: Human, and you?
Question: what race are you?
Answer: F1, thousands pay big bucks on any continent to watch me.
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A
male
reader, jimbo_jones +, writes (15 May 2008):
If I were you, I'd have fun with it. With a completely straight face, I'd tell people that I was from Antarctica and see whether I could get them to buy it or not. The beauty of it is that nobody really knows what people from Antarctica look like (are there even people in Antarctica?), so nobody will doubt what you. And since Antarctica is so obscure, you pretty much have free reign to make up whatever outlandish details you want to embellish your story. Works great as an ice breaker, because you'll always get a laugh out of the person after you reveal that you were just pulling their leg the entire time.
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A
female
reader, lexilou +, writes (15 May 2008):
 Just tell them youre one in a million and to mind their own business x
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (15 May 2008):
 I agree with Birdy that a pithy response will often lead to further interrogation. So it is best to ask them why do they want to know?
Alternatively you can simply say " I am English, I live in Britain". Or simply tell them where you are from as in : "I'm from Essex" Play it like it is a silly question and none of their beeswax.
But a few ideas ( being a comedian I feel I should offer you some bad jokes) for pithy replies.
"I'm from Betelgeuse, its about 4 thousand light years away, turn left at Orions belt and bingo! your there"
"My people come from Dagenham, we settled there 2,000 years ago after conquering a local clan of ancient hippies: they were obsessed with dancing around big chunks of rock with silly hoods on their heads saying that they were going to leave their mark on this world, so we sent them packing to Stonehenge, losers... We should never have let Whitey stay"
"Dad?..oh my god where have you been!"
or
"Mum?...oh my god where have you been!"
A comedian friend of mine has the best reply, though it most likely won't be suitable for you its a good indicator how someone else handles these rude questions by throwing the person's prejudice back in their face and getting a laugh at the same time.
When asked his ethnicity he replies.
"I'm Australian, I was born here, but my parents are from Turkey .... don't worry, I hate them too!"
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (15 May 2008):
 For complete strangers: "I'm so glad you asked, you see, I'm a representative for this charity that needs so much help, and I know you won't mind if I spend a few minutes with you talking about the need for donations to help save the _______. This is critical to help the _______! Every day, there are _______ things that happen to the ________, and.... We/they need your help, and we are looking for more philanthropic donors to help in this dire situation."
Bore them to tears, and if you can actually solicit money for a worthy cause--pick the one you really care about and fill in the blanks---all the better!
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (15 May 2008):
 I understand the best way to handle an offensive question is to say "Why do you ask?", and handle any subsequent questions the same way or in a similar fashion. "What on earth could it possibly mean to you?", "Why would you care?" and "It's of no possible relevance to you, so why on earth would you ask a question that is none of your business?" are all quite acceptable answers to rude questions. Sometimes a pithy, friendly or polite response just encourages more questions, so if you WANT the inquiry from a stranger to stop, it's okay to be a bit abrupt, in my opinion.
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