A
male
age
36-40,
*att86
writes:I have a serious feeling my girlfriend is cheating on me. She's really close friends with this guy in Singapore ( she lived there for six years but now we live together in Australia) who is supposedly her "best friend". I have met the guy a few times. She texts him constantly and deletes her inbox every day. I just looked at her inbox earlier and there's a message from him saying "I love when you say you love me" and the other night i swear i saw her text something along the lines of "I'm not happy because I'm not with you". When I opened her outbox to see if she'd actually said that she loves him, there was nothing there which makes me think she's deleted the message from her outbox straight after she's sent it. She keeps saying that she's trying to help him because he just broke up with his girlfriend. This is all really fucking with my head. I want to confront her about it but that would mean admitting I looked through her phone inbox which would just make her go absolutely mental and defensive and give her a reason to be angry at me. What should I do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2009): I know how you feel man. I had an ex that I thought was cheating on me. What lead me to believe this was the random phone calls she would get in the middle of the night. When I would ask her who it was she would tell me nobody or wrong number and I believed her. Well it kept happening and sometimes she would take the calls to another room. That's when I started thinking that there was more to it then she was telling me. Well one day she had left her mail lying around the house, her phone bill happen to be lying there (already open) so I looked inside at her phone record. I notice a number that she had been calling quite often that wasn't mine. I wanted to know who the number was that she was calling so I called the number and it was another guy so I told him that I had the wrong number and hung up. Now I had the guys number and his name but I wanted to know more before I confronted my girlfriend. Well private investigators cost to much money but I found a website that could give me information on this guy without paying. With this information I was able to find out more about the guy and even caught the two of them together.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2008): hey man 4 months ago i got suspicious about my fiance cause she was running off for hours at a time which wasnt like her and she to always deletes her outbox and inbox which constintely infuriates me but a bitch is a bitch and there isnt much u can do especially if ya love her and dont wanna beleive it cause they will lie tell the world crumbles before they admit that there doin somethin wrong so wat i suggest is just put your foot down sometimes you just have to say fuck her feelings and look out for your own and your heart doesnt lie just your mini me Haha good luck
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2008): hey dood the other day i had the same feeling about my girlfriend i asked if i could use her phone to phone up a food delivery and she was like no i have no mnutes left so i was oh ok then and anyways cuz we dont live together nd she had a new phone like 4 days before this iasked her could i c ur phone cuz i aint seen it before lol and she replied with no y do u want to look at it i said cuz i aint seen it before and at this point i thought right ur fuking hiding something and i no it so i asked her are u hiding nething her heart beat started going faster and she started to shake a little and looked guilty as fuk she was like no no no just trust me mun just trust me i said and this was on valentines night so i didnt even get to see wat was on her phone plus she kept ringing me after shed stormed outta the house hense the no minutes left on her fuking phone bu i will find out man i really think shes doing something behind my bk and if i find out she is thn good by , hope this will help man watch her reactions and try and be uy her wen u ak her feel the change in her heart beat thats how i no she was lieing and the way she reacted but i dont no wat shes hiding yet ill do another post wen i find out peace bro
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2007): hey i understand how you feel i going through the same shit my girl is always texting someone and she even put a lock on her phone,because i confronted her about a text that i read and she just got mad i also saw her call detail and she's been talking to someone all day and at all times i also confronted her about that and she change the password to the account at this point i have no proof thats she is cheating but i have reasons to think she is the best thing to do is find proof first and then confront her about it play some mind games with her like ask her if she loves you just observed her to jump into conclusion yet i know is hard and i know it hurts stay strong
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2007): Usually when you have this feeling is is right.Just keep at the messages and stuff and don't let her know until you got proof. Sad to say you are probably right.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2007): First, ask yourself. Are you usually a paranoid and insecure person? In my experience most people who feel their partners are cheating are right.
Second, whilst snopping and invading anyones privacy is wrong, I believe if your suspicions are confirmed then your partner is really in no position to play the "snooping" card.
You should approach your girlfriend, but be prepaired that she is most likely to become very defensive and angry. This is not a sign that you are wrong, but rather she does not want to be caught out.
If you do approach her, your relationship as you know it will be over. But then again, it seems it has reached this point no matter what you do.
Just look inside yourself and find your strength. If you are feeling like it is "fucking with your head" then it probably is. Your gut feeling is usually right. Judge her on her actions, not her words.
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A
male
reader, matt86 +, writes (27 February 2007):
matt86 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI could use some more opinions on this.
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A
female
reader, hunni  +, writes (26 February 2007):
she might be texting as a friend i text my guy friends that!!! anyways ur neva gonna know unless u talk 2 her? she might not be that mad about u lookimg through her phone as shes given u reason 2 dowt her!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2007): This looks like there is something going on between your girlfriend and this guy. Maybe at first she was just helping him get over his ex but it looks like the friendship is slowly turning into more, affecting your relationship. If there was nothing going on between the two of them then he wouldn't have sent that text (the one which says "I love when you say you love me"). This text shows that it is almost certain that she has said "I love you" to him which she wouldn't have done if she was serious about your relationship with her and loved you. Get rid of her, you don't need someone cheating on you. And you'll get over her in time.
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