A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:So im 15 year old female, and im gay, but I have never been in a gay relationship. I had a crush on a very straight girl, and s*** happened because of it. But then I developed a crush on a bi mate of mine. I knew she wasnt interested, so I forgot about her. Yet 5 months ago I developed a crush on a good friend, and she is openly gay. She has a crush, but wont tell me who. She knows im gay. I kind of want to ask her out, but If i do and she says no, I might ruin a really good friendship. She is my best mate, and I love her, but idk what to do...
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2015): My dear, your feelings are all over the place; and you're jumping from one crush to another. You're a little too young to be so certain of your sexual-identity; and I'm too old and wise to debate that issue with you. I've got time and experience on my side.
You spend too much time labeling people...gay, bi-sexual, straight; or whatever. That is proof you don't have a clue what you're doing; because you're far too young to know any better that to do such things.
How about just remaining friends with your best friend, and leaving it at that?
You're pouncing your "gayness" on everybody, and you really need to take a "chill-pill" and just settle down a bit. Get to know more about the feelings you have; and learn more about yourself before pushing it on your best friend.
You're eager to find someone you can relate to, and your crushing is a little out of control. The incident with the "straight-girl" was proof you need to get a grip on your feelings. If you give yourself some time, things will start to fall into place. Maybe then you won't pressure your best friend to be something she may not be. Even if she is gay; it doesn't automatically mean she wants to have a gay relationship with you.
Let things happen naturally. You're trying too hard and you don't understand enough about what being gay means. It takes many years to deal with it, and even more time for others to get used to it. Just because you can openly claim to be gay, doesn't mean you're old enough to be out. As you will learn as time passes. Lots of young people I know have done exactly what you're doing. They didn't listen to my advice; but found out what I said is true. It took getting their feelings hurt multiple times to decide maybe they should listen and wait.
I'm gay, and I know very much about it.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2015): I dont have any advice. I just sympathize with your situation. Nobody can advise you. It comes down to what do you fear most? not asking and never knowing and always regretting? or ask her, take the risk... if it goes tits up pat yourself on the back... next time you fancy someone you just ask them quicker .... or if goes well.. your going out with her
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